What do you say to your audiophile friends who say you just listen to your equipment more

Than your music. I have my retort but let me hear yours. Not everybody understands us. Thanks. 
It's always been about the music. The audio gear is just a way to get there in audibly satisfactory way.
I tell them that they’re right (sometimes) and also point out that they are smarter than I because they can be satisfied with a $50 Bluetooth speaker while I have to spend at least 20% of my income to truly enjoy the sound... 
Great sound enhances the appreciation of great music.  The gear is a means to an end, not an end in itself
I think I'm a music lover first and I think we all are looking for the magic sound!! The gear is the vessel to get us there!!