jumping back in, where should i start?

No, what i am saying is the speakers should sound full at a reasonable volume and that should only increase with volume not the sound it self.

I don't know your speakers but speaker efficiency needs to be considered if you are looking for low volume performance . By low volume I mean a level that does not require one to raise their voice for normal conversation in the listening area .

At first glance your 91db. speakers would look like decent candidates for low volume listening . But , a couple of other things need to be considered here .
1.) What does the impedance curve look like ? Does it dip way down in the bass region or have other wild swings ? You want a curve that is fairly flat near and above 8 ohms .
2.) What does the crossover network look like ? You need something that will use a minimum amount of power to operate it .
A single driver speaker would be ideal but a two way isn't bad if there is not a complicated network doing the division . Something like mine , which only have a capacitor , would be nice .
3.) What size is your bass driver ? It takes more power to drive a 15" woofer as opposed to a 5" one .

When considering low level listening it is important to get as much use out of the first watt of your amp as possible . If much or all of that first watt is used to operate your crossover network and/or drive a big woofer then you will need to increase the wattage , turn it up , to get good sound characteristics .

I hope that this helps you .

Good luck .