The Rel setup instructions are explicit in how to set the crossover and volume level. Read the instructions in the manual.
This is a summary of the instructions.
1) Turn the crossover all the way down
2) Play test track
3) Adjust volume until the sub blends with the mains
4) Adjust crossover until sub becomes noticeable and then reduce crossover and make small adjustments to find the proper crossover point
Basically disregard what you see visually and tune the Rel volume and crossover based on what you hear.
This is a summary of the instructions.
1) Turn the crossover all the way down
2) Play test track
3) Adjust volume until the sub blends with the mains
4) Adjust crossover until sub becomes noticeable and then reduce crossover and make small adjustments to find the proper crossover point
Basically disregard what you see visually and tune the Rel volume and crossover based on what you hear.