Dragon_vibe, why don't you just leave The Dude alone, like you said you were going to do? Smaller manufacturers, like TRL, are not for everyone. If you want something with lots of information and formal reviews, then you will need to pay for that marketing campaign. It sounds like you want an Audio Research preamp. So just go and get one already.
I've been in this "game" a long time, and as with any decision in life, there are +'s and -'s to any decision. You say you want to spend less than $6000, but want something equal or better than a ARC Ref 5SE. Since you cannot even buy a used Ref 5SE for $6000, that leaves you only with the choice of a small, boutiques type manufacturer, where your money is invested in the product and not in marketing.
Generally, boutique brands that I've heard or owned do offer more bang for the buck. However, you usually will not find them at discount on the used market, and they tend to drain you if you decide to change direction and sell. You should only buy if you intend to keep it for quite a while, IMHO.
Again, I have never heard The Dude, so I cannot say anything about it. However, it sounds as if you had a falling out with the manufacturer, and said you were going to leave them off your list. I suggest that you follow up on your promise, and move on.
