Do audiophiles hate large subwoofers?

I heard a REL S3 subwoofer demoed with a pair of Vienna Acoustic Mozart tower speakers and had a difficult time hear the difference when they plugged in the REL and unplugged it.  I thought I had good ears for music.  I wonder why I wasn't able to hear much of a difference.  However, I continue to hear great things about how musical REL subwoofers are.  The T/9i's are only 300 watt subwoofers compared to the S3's which have 400 watts.  This seems very low in comparison to other subwoofers on the market.  REL as well as the dealer told me it is not about watts but the way REL images seamlessly with left and right front speakers.

However, I did hear a difference when they demoed a pair of Dahli monitors with REL's small Tzero series.  The sales person did the same exercise by plugging in the subwoofer and then unplugging it to hear the difference.  The first time he did that I was unable to hear the difference.  Before he did this a second time, he asked me to listen more clearly.  I did not notice much of an increase in bass, but what I did hear was more clarity in the vocals.  The salesman told me I should be hearing more space and dimension to enhance the sound stage so I could visualize the artists sitting in front of me performing.

The salesman told me if I was expecting to hear a throbbing bass, the REL's are not designed to do this because if I did, they would eventually drive me out of the room.  He said they were designed to make the front speakers sound better with more clarity to enhance what they were designed and capable of doing.  I wonder what others think in the group.  I am afraid when adding a pair of either T/9i's or even a pair of S3's to my system my wife will not hear the difference and will be upset with my spending the money.

I think you’re original question about large subs can also be about visual integration and optimal placement. The bigger the box the more visually dominant it is in your room. That’s not always attractive.  They are also harder to place. Any sub stuck in a corner won’t sound it’s best. Unless you want that movie theater bass flab. The audiophiles I know that have experienced a well integrated sub/subs are no longer against them. 

@ivan_nosnibor, the amplifiers in the Rythmik plate amps are not bandwidth limited, they are "normal" Class A/B (the A370 model) or H (the H600 model) full range amplifiers. It is the filter settings chosen by the user that determines at what frequency roll off occurs. All Rythmik plate amps provide controls related to low-pass filtering (the frequency at which the sub's output is rolling off at the upper end of it's operating range), and even a filter for rolling off the low end of the sub (at either 14, 20, or 28Hz), along with a "damping" control, with high, low, and medium settings. One model plate amp (the A370PEQ) also provides high-pass filtered outputs on a pair of RCA jacks (that output signal is sent to the amp powering the main speakers used with the sub). That high-pass filtering is achieved via opamps (as it is in most crossovers), which are in general not "audiophile approved" ;-) . 

@bdp24, thank you very kindly for the scoop! I may have some figuring to do in the long run. I'm trying something else for now, but it's definitely nice to have a plan B to turn to if things here don't pan out well!