At some point after college there was this one young lady, she cooked the best meals and it made me want to learn to cook. This is kinda cliche but being a guy and all the first thing I decide to learn to cook is chili. Well its pathetic. Diced onion added to Dennison. Pathetic.
But I kept at it and in less than 5 years came up with my own from-scratch chili recipe. Shredded (not ground!) beef, fresh herbs and chiliβs, it was to die for.
One year the office decides to have a chili cook-off. Right away I am trash-talking. Its not fair, amateur vs professional, like that, on and on. For weeks. Merciless cut-throat trash talk.
Finally, the big day. Of course my chili wins. Easily. Hands-down. Three different people came up to me and said basically, "I was determined not to vote for you. No matter what. But damn, that chili is good!"
If it helps, imagine me an 80 year old woman in a rocking chair rolling a joint and flipping you the finger. Might as well. Probably am.
