I enjoyed reading some of your proposed alternatives, especially the one about the subwoofer ;~) I think the best way is still playing records as Steve said. However, you can break in a cartridge while you're away by using the Cardas sweep/burn in record. It has white noise bands that are continuous (don't run out.) The record is made of extra hard vinyl just for this purpose, and if you leave your whole system on at low/moderate volume, you get some additional burn-in for your system too.
RE the recommended break-in time: I don't know why cartridge manufacturers all seem to quote such low break-in times! If you ask around, you'll discover that most folks will tell you a new moving coil cartridge requires a minimum of 100 hours (150 just to be sure) so I don't understand the manufacturers' lack of candor on this pooint. And that would take about four to six days playing the Cardas record 27/7. Which is what I did, and it worked just fine. However, I heard no difference after the first 60 hours (the manufacturer recommended 30!) It was bright and glarey, and I thought I'd made a terrible mistake! But after 100, everything changed and continued to get better and better until 125-150 or so.
It would be a lot smarter for the manufacturers to be honest and not raise expectations unnecessarily.