I used to read them 20 years ago for serious consideratio, then 10 years ago for humor, and now I do not even find any humor in them...
May I help you?
When you read this (it means that)
The Audio Adventure
In spite of the measurement anomalies, this speaker is clearly a state-of-the-art product.
(It didn't SOUND broken when we gave it our top rating)
It was definitely Borderline Class A.
(It isn't that good, but it's sooo expensive and they're letting me keep it --- G-d I feel so cheap!)
Light years ahead of the competition.
(The competition won't give us a review sample)
This preamp is the new reference.
(We aint giving it back, and we aint payin' for it either)
We hire only the best writers.
(We'll hire any audiophile who recognizes a pencil two out of three tries)
This product had me pulling one record after another from my collection.
( I listened to all five of my records)
The images in the soundstage had that elusive and seductive sense of palatable presence.
(I haven't had sex since my wife left me and I'm starting to hallucinate)
Every once in a long while a product comes along that redefines the way we think about audio.
(I love my DSS satellite system)