First and foremost, I would focus upon finding a speaker that really does it for you and be prepared if necessary to budget the greater portion of your resources toward that aim. Since you are looking for suggestions, my clear recommendation is the Obelisk speaker by Shahinian Acoustics. It is a beautifully made little poly/omnidirectional speaker that I have found is truly excellent with classical music. Indeed, I have come across no other speaker so unobtrusive that can deliver on such a large scale. Here's what one reviewer writes: "They really come into their own with well recorded acoustical jazz and classical music--the penchant of their designer. Shahinian knows well and loves the sound of the concert hall and knows how to produce speakers that evoke the beauty, bloom, and emotional sweep of live music." Another of the real pluses about the Obelisk is that unlike typical/conventional speaker designs, you can position yourself BETWEEN them and even BEHIND them, and the resultant experience is merely a pleasing, but respectively different perspective on the same performance. Hence, instead of being limited strictly to a very limited "sweet spot," whereby you experience the concert from the audience's perspective, you can in addition, experience it from an on-stage/right in the middle of the orchestra perspective, and even from a backstage/behind the orchestra perspective! And guess what? Shahinian outfits his Obelisks with casters, not spikes---so let's say the mood should strike that you feel like fantasizing that you are "getting it on," as you say, center stage, surrounded by your favorite orchestra, in the midst of your favorite orchestral passage, you just simply and easily wheel those Obelisks out and place them so that you are right smack in between them (wherever that might happen to be), and VOILA! Please do check them out at Shahinian's website at: http://www.shahinianacoustics.com/ for a lot more info, and photos. For what it's worth---and I'm not talking about merely the getting it on scene, but wherever they've been placed, they're one of very few speakers I have known women to actually REMARK that they really like. I have had mine pretty much for the entire 21 years that I've been married (yes, they are still making the same speaker, but with internal upgrades that reflect the state of current technology) and though many speakers have since come and gone, my wife simply will not let me sell the Obelisks. They may go out of use now and then, replaced by something new, but to this day, every time they are put back into a system and my wife hears them once again, she inevitably says the same thing, "Now THAT'S the sound I like...why can't you find new speakers that sound like that?" So much for the issue of your speakers.------------- Now, I'll try to make the rest of my comments short. Speaking in general terms, my experience has been that women love the sound of tubes and abhor solid state. As such, I concur with Trelja with respect to the choice of a Jolida integrated tube amp. And doesn't the name, "Jolida" just sound like it's the right choice for this application? Given the price of the Obelisks, you may wish to go with their JD 202A model, at $750 list. Here's what one reviewer had to say about this unit, "For nary the cost of a bad weekend in Vegas (aren't they all?), the wonders of a honey-smooth tube toy can be yours." You can check out their website at: http://www.newtube.com/jolida.html. At their price points, I am sure you will find the Jolida products quite aesthetically pleasing as well.------------- Now on to your front end. Of course, vinyl IS the coolest, but I agree with one prior writer's observation and can't imagine that anyone would want to have to deal with the changing of LPs when they are in the midst of getting it on. My recommendation therefore (in consideration of course to your budget) is that you forego at this point, the notion of going for any of these high/mid-priced CD players. Such is clearly not necessary, particularly in these uncertain digital format times. Instead, you'll find you can pick yourself up a brand new Pioneer DVD player, like the 525 model, for a song---say around $200 on the web. Use this as your transport, coupled with MSB's Link DAC lll and for about $500, you will have yourself a digital front end that would have cost you ten times that, just a couple of years back. A CLEAR bonus you get with this combo is that you can play DVD audio disks---and though there is admittedly a very limited selection available right now, there are indeed a few really good ones out there and you will no doubt be amazed at how much additional pleasure this format has to offer over conventional CDs.------------------------------------------ This of course won't leave you with all that much left over from your $4000 budget for accessories, but thankfully, you WILL be able to afford the excellent value interconnects and speaker cables put out by Mapleshade and/or DH Labs----Finally, as for the choice of WINE and all of the to-be-expected come-ons, I'll be leaving the cute/erudite comments to the bon vivant/Rico Suave crew. Rather, I'd suggest what would be infinitely tres cool is if you would get someone you really like to take you to Napa or Paris and that you make it a point to bring home some of those wines you have particularly enjoyed along the way. Good luck!
