To clarify re: "overloading the room".
That is not - and never has been - the issue for me.
When setting up strictly by ear, I always start by attempting to level match at the x-over point. I have generally been good to within +/- 5db in that job (the most critical set-up element IMO as smooth response thru the "hand-off" is critical to seamless integration). That result is always verified by measurement after the fact (and subsequently tweaked).
The issue with the approach is generally "lumpiness" - I've always had 10+db peaks and/or nulls without EQ - despite exhaustive placement optimization efforts. Sometimes there's a somewhat excessive bass balance overall, sometimes it's a little light overall. It's never particularly smooth - as measured or (more importantly) as heard in A/B comparison with subsequently EQ'd bass.
The issue is virtually moot with bass management software. The Audyssey set-up protocol involves setting the average aggregated sub output at 75db per measurement on a bass sweep. The resulting measured on-axis FR is essentially flat across the entire range of the system. The difference between pre EQ and post EQ is not overall bass level, it's freedom of peaks and valleys in the response. The audible difference is not in overall bass level, it's in articulation through the bass and mids.
While my subs have the capability of producing much higher SPL (the 75db start point results in the gain pots being near the low end of their potential travel), the benefit here is less driver excursion and distortion. A peek at measured distortion tests will reveal VERY large values (often well north of 30%) for most subs as driver excursion (and SPL) increases, but I'll pass on the debate as to the audibility of this phenomenon. I will only note that the remaining potential clean output of the subs that is foregone by my set-up ensures that I've minimized distortion - for whatever you think that's worth.
The bottom line is: this ain't about overloading the listening room
Listen for yourself. Wolf is an experienced professional sound guy and I respect that credential, but I've always been surprised by his emphatic stated preference for non EQ'd subs. As noted, in my book this is a black and white issue, but - as also noted - I appreciate that other people's books are different from mine.
As a side note, I usually have a guitar in my hand 3 to 4 hours a day and feel pretty good about the subjective side of this evaluation as well as the measured evidence, The good news is, this is a very easy, very clean A/B testing opportunity - as long as there's a good, high-end AV place locally. IMHO, everyone who cares should satisfy themselves on this one.