Wedding toasts... let's hear them

Don't promise anything in a toast you don't have complete control over (like a feeling) because, rest assured no matter how long you stay married, she'll remember it verbatim.

Do you need any poll-bearers?

Ah, audiophile wedding toasts.

"May this marriage last longer than that crappy integrated amp I told you not to buy."

"May this bond be the interconnect between two great components."

"May you hear each other perfectly, even without speakers."

"Though you will both hear crackles in the background, it's the beautiful music of love that will come shining through."

And it just sort of goes on like that.

not sure it's good for a wedding, but i've always liked:

"may misfortune follow you all of your life and never catch up."

May the happiest day of you past, be the saddest day of your future.