I used to be a "solid state bigot" but about a year ago replaced my solid state preamp with a tube model.
1. How long do they last? I suspect it depends on how much current is running thru them. In my experience, tubes seem to start to sound "dull" in power amps after a year or so, but in preamps, last much longer, being that they don't flow so much current. I have a friend whose preamp tubes are 8 or 9 years old.
2. When I got my new tube preamp it seemed that the tubes seemed to "settle in" in about 100 hours of playing time.
3. I replaced the stock tubes with Gold Lions, and I found the sound improved immediately, especially female vocals, acoustic piano and violin. After the Gold Lions broke in, they sounded even better than the stock tubes.
4. For the preamp I own, most people seem to enjoy the Gold Lions. My preamp came new with JJ tubes and they were OK, but not as "musical" as the Gold Lions.