The "Very Best Record Cleaning Formulation"

The "Very Best Record Cleaning Formulation"


I am providing this formulation for all who are interested in the very best, and can be proven and demonstrated to be the "Very Best". It can easily be made from available ingredients. On the surface, it appears to be very simple. However, it is based on extensive complex chemistry along with precise mathematical calculations and verifiable data.


You may use it with absolute confidence and be truly assured that it is beyond doubt the "Very Best". You may use it for your personal needs. Or, archival entities may use it for their purposes with confidence. Or, you may choose to start an enterprise that makes and packages quantities as either a "ready-to-use" or a "Semi-concentrated" version for sale and distribution knowing that nothing better exists. You have my blessings and encouragement with one condition. And, that is, that the pricing represents a "fair margin", and, not an obscene gouging, typical for such products.


Initially, I had prepared a presentation that briefly introduced myself, and provided the thought processes, design parameters, and the necessary basics of chemistry, physics, and mathematics to assure you and allow you to be absolutely confident in this formulation. I made a considerable effort to keep it as simple, but, also as thorough enough to achieve this confidence. However, that presentation entailed 5,239 words, typical of such a requirement, however, unacceptable in length by this website forum.


I have no option other than to offer the formulation as a 100% parts by weight version suitable to produce 1 Kilogram of the cleaner, and, invite you to question me about any aspect of the formulation.


Professionally, I am a Chemist, more specifically a Polyurethane Chemist. I have a Doctorate in Chemistry as well as two other Doctorates and a M.B.A.. I held prominent positions in significant corporations before being encouraged to start our (wife and I) manufacturing facility servicing those I previously worked for. We started, owned, and fully operated this business. We eventually obtained 85+% Market Share in our sector in Medical, Automotive, Sporting Goods, and Footwear areas before retirement.


The Audio Industry is extremely technical and many brilliant minds have contributed their talents over the decades in order that we may enjoy music today as we choose. Like many other technical industries, those of lesser minds and values invade the arena with their "magical" inspired revelations and offer their "magical" ingredients and items to all at extremely high prices. They promise that if only we are willing to part with our money - they can provide these items to you that make your audio system sound as if the orchestra, or vocalist, is in your room with you. And, after all, "magical items" must be expensive, otherwise, they would not be "magical".


This disturbs me enormously, and, it is for such reasons, I feel compelled to provide realistic and truthful information that conforms to basic Engineering, Chemistry, Physics, and Mathematical Principals in those areas with which I am very knowledgeable and familiar.


          "Ultimate Record Cleaner Solution"


   Ingredient                                          Amount by Weight (Grams)


Distilled Water                                     779.962


Ethyl Alcohol                                       220.000


Tergitol 15-S-7 (Dow Chemical)            0.038  (Approx. = 2 Drops)



Important and/or Relevant Criteria


1.)  Distilled Water ONLY. Do not use deionized, tap, rain, or spring water. Distilled Water is readily available in most grocery stores. Check labeling to be certain that it is distilled and not deionized. The pricing is comparable.


2.)  Ethanol must be purchased at a "Liquor Store" or a "Liquor Control Board" that is suitable for human consumption, and the appropriate taxes must be paid. This assures that the alcohol consists of only Ethyl Alcohol and water. You need to purchase the 95+% version, also known as 180+ Proof. NOTHING ELSE is acceptable. (100% Ethyl Alcohol is not available under "normal" circumstances). Denatured alcohol from a Hardware Store or elsewhere is PROHIBITED, as well as ANY other alcohols.


3.)  Tergitol 15-S-7 is made by Dow and is available on the internet in small quantities from Laboratory Supply Houses such as Fisher and Advance, etc.. I have no affiliations with either Dow Chemical, or Fisher, or Advance. You MUST use Tergitol 15-S-7 ONLY. No other Tergitol product is acceptable for this designed formula, and you need to acquire the undiluted form only.


4.)  The above cleaner formula will result in a non-foaming (VLF) Surfactant Formulation that exhibits the following:

            Surface Tension of 28.5 dynes/centimeter @ 20 C. (68.0 F.)

            Surface Tension of 28.2 dynes/centimeter @ 25 C. (77.0 F.)


5.). A Surface Tension of 28.5 dynes/centimeter is Remarkable and will properly clean records of all organic soilings, and all oily substances, as well as very significant amounts of inorganic soilings.  This available Surface Tension coupled with the Azeotropic Characteristics of very rapid evaporation and spotless drying occur because of the selection of Ethyl Alcohol and the very specific concentration determined as 22.00% p.b.w., further improves the products abilities.  The "Ease-of-Use" and "Spot-Free" results are to be accepted.


6.). Be aware that an "ideal temperature of use" also exists for this formulation.  And, that reasonable temperature is 40 C. (104.0 F.). Further increases in temperature offers no improvement, therefore, confirming the proper use of the term "ideal". I mention this not because of of any substantial improvement, but, only to be aware of its’ existence. And, if you have a choice to utilize a room that is warmer than another, select the warmer room closer to 104.0 F. There is no need to elevate the temperature of the records or the materials. Simply be aware that 104.0 F. Is ideal.


If interest is expressed in this submission, I am willing to provide additional submissions regarding other materials, and, other areas of interest.  Such as"Best Contact Substance", "Best lubricants for turntables", " Better Dampening Materials" for turntables and tonearms, and, most significantly, "Best" material for "Turntable Platter/Vinyl Record Interface" usually called "Record Mats". The last item will certainly disturb many individuals and anger many suppliers.


Whatever I may contribute is substantiated by Science and Testing, and Verifiable. Science has no Opinions. Opinions in these matters are best reserved for those who rely on their imagination and wishful thinking.


Also, I have no vested interests in this Industry. Simply possess some scientific knowledge that also relates to some aspects of the Audio Area, and I am willing to share that information if requested!


As a means to prevent working at height, there is trend in Cleaning to Pole Clean with a Pressure Jet System using Carbon Fibre Poles  that can reach up to Five Storeys.

This method is commonly seen carried out using distilled water as it is a streak free drying substance..

Because of this there are plenty of cheap offers to be found for distilled water.

I have always trod carefully and purchased a Lab Grade Water, from recollection I believe conforms to PubChem CID 962, i'm also sure PPM were checked out as well. I genuinely have no idea, how my water conforms when being discussed by the likes of @wizzzard  

Distilled is still cheap enough around here (99 cents a gallon)  Works perfectly with my mix! 


you had a great post until......".I would suggest to Mr. Wizard (unless he insists on being addressed by the honorific "Dr." which I find to be pretentious except when applied to medical doctors), "  Why?? "medical doctors" were cutting your hair, lancing boils and chopping off limbs w/out anesthetic a little over a hundred years ago.  OH yes,  a shave with that?  "Dr" Copernicus was studying the galaxy 500 years before that.

You can have any "pretentious finds" you want but the term :doctor" was used 1000s of years before the AMA.. 

Doctor comes from the Latin word for "teacher" and originally referred to a small group of theologians who had approval from the Church to speak on religious matters. Eventually the term saw greater use referring to qualified academic and medical professionals. While doctor most often refers to a medical doctor, academic doctors can rightfully claim it too. And they have lexical and etymological evidence to back their claim.  In the centuries between then and now, doctor has had many other applications, including referencing a soldering tool, a tropical sea breeze, and a loaded die. It's almost exclusively used of people now, and both qualified academics and medical practitioners may rightfully claim it. (taken from a web dic so as to to be accused of plagiarism)

I am a "dr" by any definition you choose to use but it is not pretentious for use by any persons of any discipline that has earned a "Doctorate of ---- degree

I can assure you that no Doctor of 19th century Polish accordion music will answer the call of the flight attendant calling for a "DR"  on a flight as a person is grabbing their chest and turning blue.

Best to you


In the past I travelled/commuted with a Very well educated Lady, who had a Cambridge University Education and was at her time as a Student very involved with the Female Rowing Team.

On a commute and in a discussion with another about a medical condition, I invited this Lady to contribute as her Husband was a "Dr".

I was informed the Husband was "Dr" through being a mathematician and not medicine.

As the Journey continued, I probed the mathematics that were being carried out. To which the 'layman' description was given and now my not so accurate a recital of this description, that the area of maths worked with was a Speculative Math that was working with Astronomy.

Further probing revealed the Husband is nominated for a Nobel Peace Prize for the discoveries made.

I was the 'Cat that got the Cream' for a few days after that reveal.

I also learnt Professor Brian Cox regularly visits for dinner😎

I’ve been informed, and amused by the chemistry and psychology in this thread. 
tianks to all that have given good information 🤣