Funniest sales pitch

I've always had trouble with "DOWNSIZING"
How can someone want to buy something of lesser quality than they already have especially audio.

One liners

..your gain my loss
..first $XXXX takes it...no kidding..
..wife says it has to go..
..you would have to spend a trillion $$$ to get better...

What's a good reason to sell? I've bought way more stuff than I can use while trying to find synergy in my system. I'd like to sell some of the stuff that didn't stay in my system and all of it is nice gear with rabid fans -- it would be great in somebody's system, but I just can't use it all! And -- yes -- I even have a multi-channel amp that I bought thinking I would build another multi-channel home theater in the house somewhere and have never opened the box. Thanks to you guys, whenever I go to sell these items, I will be hearing snickers in my ears if I put ANYTHING in my ad to explain why I am selling.
THANKS!!!

I always like the ones that emphasize that the unit is "barely used" like it's some sort of collector automobile or something. I want to see something like, "used constantly, and it works and sounds like a dream".

I also like the $100K speakers that "were bought five years ago, used for one day and then have been in storage since".

"If you're looking at this ad, you know how incredible these XXXX are." Four paragraphs later, I think I'm beginning to get an idea.

"If you pay my asking price (on a $350 interconnect cable), I'll include the shipping."

Or, leave the retail price blank when it's only 10% higher than the asking price.

Rgairns.. "won't fit on my rack, so it has to go!"

I saw one like this(LOL) The guy was selling his multi-thousand dollar amp because it wouldn't fit on his $150.00 rack.. talk about your red flags!