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How many audiophiles to screw in a light bulb?

This occured to me as an addendum to the current "Wacko" thread:

How many audiophiles does it take to screw in a light bulb?

One to tell all the others that they should be using HIS light bulb, which blows away all the competition. Worth fifteen times the price he paid, the light caused him to deposit his jaw somewhere in the room where he first witnessed the light of this amazing bulb. He also requests if anyone should find his jaw that he would be grateful for its prompt return as he hasn't been able to eat any solid food ever since.

Three to argue about bulb's placement in the room for maximum light dispersion.

Six to insist that the bulb would render superior light if powered by the Phallic Serpent $2500 power cord.

Two to insist that light bulbs are old technology and introduce distortion into the spectrum of light.

Four to declare that a light bulb is no substitute for "real" light, and to greater appreciate the light the bulb provides one must also go out and absorb as much "real" light as possible.

Three to ask why there are so many used light bulbs on the market.

Two to suggest a power regenerator may stabilize the bulb's output and provide for greater enjoyment of the light eminating from it.

Twelve to argue the chain of hierarchy in delivery of the optimum output of light from the bulb.

One to design a custom stabilizing harness for the bulb, fabricated from polished steel and burled Bubinga wood to assure the bulb will be held in place and be immune to all vibrations.... in great style. Filled with lead shot, of course.

Four to suggest doing several A/B/A comparisons of different bulbs before deciding upon one.

Six to quote the recent bulb shootout in The Absolute Light that declared that Home Depot bulbs are every bit as good as NOS GE bulbs.

Three to decry that it's all snake oil, and point out that the rest of the bunch are all whackos and the world is coming to an end anyway.

OK, I'm sure some of you can come up with a few more....

Marco

jax2
david_berry
211 posts
 
Man, that mirror your holding up Marco sure is clean! I have been heavily surfing the audio forums for over 3 years and after reading this, I am grining like a fool but nodding my head.

Now close it down dammit, you're pulling people away from the thread I started!

Oh yeah, three to point out that all bulbs give off exactly the same amount of light as they performed a DBT.
jax2 OP
3,031 posts
 
Four to state they are suffering from fatigue after prolonged exposure to their
bulbs.

Sixty four to establish and proliferate an entirely new vocabulary to describe
the various attributes of light bulbs and the light they produce.

Sixteen to wax rhetorical on the one bulb they should never have sold back in
the mid 80's.

One to shamelessly plug the bulb they currently have for sale, and explain the
various reasons they are selling it even though it is the finest bulb they've
ever owned.

Three to check with their wives to make sure the bulb in question is
acceptable for their homes.
pehare's avatar
pehare
835 posts
 
a thread inquiry posted to determine when one needs to be changed
sdatch
204 posts
 
Don't forget about the gargantuan, corrugated, razor-sharp, aluminum heat-sink around the base (bass?) of the bulb. I'm sure some would argue that that gives the bulb's light more of a mid-hall perspective, at which point we would all be reminded that this is subjective and a matter of personal taste...
inpepinnovations1e75
395 posts
 
And since a light bulb is a tube, its wattage is of course "better" than the solid state one, which would be an LED, I guess. Musn't forget that since NASCAR uses only LEDs in their race cars, tube light cars can't be as good, though.
Bob P.
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