Don't get my original post wrong BTW. I'm happily married (if that tired cliche really exists as more than an oxymoron...). My wife knows how much I spent and on what. My system is only around $25-30K (will be around or over $30k when I upgrade the TV). I have my own private office/listening room in the basement that is around 40 ft by 20 ft in size, give or take (more than half is my listening room home theatre space). I do have to compensate my wife for making my resent purchases, but admittedly her requests were not nearly as expensive (but it is all money I brought to the marriage, which is why she is not unreasonable about it). She is not happy about the things I have bought, but she lives with it. I didnt sneak around, but I certainly didnt advertise, though I never lied about it when asked.
I started out by saying, "most of the women who are wives in my area", because it is true for most women I have met, and what I said about men is true about most men I have met. Actually, I am exaggerating; most of the men I have met are whipped and afraid to stand up for a few privileges in the houses that they pay for, as per the reclining chair example. Not compromising enough to let your husband have one chair he enjoys sitting in, in the den no less, is sadistic IMO, especially since it can be upholstered to match any decor. Albeit my wife has the rest of the house and picks everything, but I still have recliners in the den!