Something just isn't there

lobsterrotter ...

First and foremost, consider your room to be THE major component in your system. 

You can solve the "wife problem" by investing in Synergistic Research HFT's. These little guys are NOT subtle at all. Highly recommended. 

http://highend-electronics.com/products/sr-hft-high-frequency-transformer

Start with a ten-pack of the HFT's and go from there. 

Buy some of Herbie's tube dampners for your tubes. Again, highly recommended. They will give you more of a NATURAL sense of detail because they remove the glare and smear caused by micro vibrations coming from your tubes. 

http://herbiesaudiolab.net/tube.htm

Also, instead of concentrating on "detail," concentrate on tonal balance. I've heard super transparent systems that after 20 minutes of listening, I'm looking for the exit door. The emotional impact comes from recreating live instruments in the room ... or at least as close as you can get. And live listening isn't about "detail." I have never attended a live concert and thought to myself ... man, those guys sound "detailed." 

Inna is correct in the assessment of stock power cords. Synergistic Research has some reasonably priced after market PC's available. There's a thread detailing them here on A'gon. Go with the more expensive SR Black cords over the Reds. 

http://highend-electronics.com/products/synergistic-research-red-black-uef-power-cords

Get rid of your stock fuses and replace them with Synergistic Research Black fuses. These are little wonders. 

http://highend-electronics.com/products/synergistic-research-black-quantum-fuses

And finally, mapman is correct in his assessment of floors. You can go a long way in solving the floor problem with an inexpensive set of Mapleshade unfinished platforms under your speakers or stands. Just spike the platforms to the floor though the carpet, then spike the speakers to the platforms.

http://shop.mapleshadestore.com/18-x-15-x-2-Ready-To-Be-Finished-Maple-Platform/productinfo/18X15X2-...

None of these "tweaks" are subtle; they are major improvements. Check out my system in the virtual system area. My listening room was a major roadblock to good sound. Without changing speakers or electronics, I've managed, through the above tweaks and others, to transform the system into one of the most tonally correct systems I've ever heard. My audiophile friends who've heard the system all agree. Its emotionally engaging and puts the performers right there in the room. All of the usual things we look for are there ... sound stage, depth, height, natural detail, tonal balance ... all there to enjoy. All wife friendly too. :-)

Hope this helps ...

Frank

Yes one thing that is often "not there" is actually physically feeling the music as well as hearing it.     

I might suggest a couple of things to try.....

First is to move the speakers around.  Look for a change is sweet spot in the room.  Change your listening position. 

And I noticed a sudden lifelessness in my own system the other evening.  I noticed that I had accidentally hit the Invert button on the remote for my Herron VTSP-3A preamp and inverted the absolute phase across the entire system.  I hit the Invert button and changed back to normal absolute phase and the system woke up again. 

So maybe try inverting the leads on both speakers to see if that doesn't make a difference. 

Don't ask me, I used to never believe in absolute phase, but it made a difference on this occasion for me in my system.