When I move the SPL around even a foot or two it changes everything but the suck out cant be cured to any huge degree so I am curious as to possible solutions
This kind of result is quite normal - you may not even realize that you were getting "one note bass" for years. If you get it right then the bass riffs anchoring much music will take on a whole new world - a balanced sound where each note is audible. The problem is your room.
finding out the Emperor has no clothes isnt fun but is needed to get to the performance we all strive for.
Yes and perhaps it would change some peoples attitude towards the gear merry-go-round if they realized what a major effect the room plays.
The only real solution is to have way too much bass..so add another sub....then you can cut the peaks down to get a flatter response. Going from -15 db trough to -6 db will make all the difference...don't try to get flat and avoid boosting unless you have extremely powerful amps and huge woofers....most systems would distort terribly at modest levels with a 15 db boost in the hard to drive bass.
Bass traps help suckouts but you need a lot of big traps to have significant impact - nevertheless every trap will help provided it is large and at least 4 inches thick and placed in a corner.