Jackson - By all means I don't think you are picking on me. I have much thicker skin.
Your perception of phase is correct. However, when it comes to surround sound, it can take on a different "form", for a lack of better terms.
Hopefully this will explain things a little better. Fair warning, this goes completely against what you instruction manual or common surround expertise has to offer. If your system is fortunate enough to make the setup (no furniture, lack of other objects in the room, exactly the same distance), then this is of no use.
Take your front soundstage (L,C,R) speakers. For this purpose lets say your L and R speaker are 10ft. from the listening position. You dial in 10ft into the processor for the L and R. The processor "directs" or "coordinates" the necessary signal processing and so that the speaker ultimately produces the sound to arrive at the correct time based on the inputed distance. Now lets add the C. Again, if the speaker is located 10ft, just about everyone sets the C distance to 10ft in the processor.
Here's where the delay can effect the phase of the speaker. If the C is set to 12ft and its actually 10ft in distance, for example, the processor is essentially telling the speaker/drivers to speed up playing the information so that it would arrive at the listening position as if it where physically located 12ft away. Remember, you told the processor the C is 12ft, but its really 10ft. This equates to less delay and faster driver motion. The C is out of time sync with the L and R, and the phase has shifted for the C drivers in comparison to the L and R. FWIW, this goes hand and hand with the comments I've made in the past about having all 6 speaker (LCR, Rears and sub) playing as one. Thats another discussion for later, though.
Give this a shot. Whatever your C channel setting is, back the distance up in the processor (in smallest possible increments). If it's 10ft, tell the processor its 10.5 and listen to the change. Then do 11ft and listen. 11.5ft and listen. You will notice an increase in depth perception. Depending on your rear settings (same rules applied too) you will notice an increase of soundstage width. For reference, you may have to quite the C a bit too. Maybe a db or 2.
I hope I didn't confuse you even more. If so, I am truly sorry. If you still don't get what I'm saying, but actually care, shoot me an email.