A lot of the posts above definitely resonate (pun intended) with me. After re-reading this post before submission, I realize that I am being verbose and pedantic, but it's a slow, warm and humid Saturday afternoon, and I am in a mood to be verbose and pedantic. Apologies in advance!
I would add that subject to several exceptions and as a very general matter, I like the home venue best. As a threshold matter, I agree with the OP that many folks think that live music is the absolute reference. In fact, there is another OP running here on A'gon which is capturing comments about the importance -- or lack thereof -- of so called accuracy.
Frankly, I think the concept of sonic "gain on a wire" is nonsense. If the absolute standard is listening to an unamplified, un-modulated, un-engineered, un-dubbed/mixed and unadulterated performance, then I think most of us would be disappointed. Instead, IMHO, I think venue ambience, comfort, company and drink are non-sonic/muscial factors that contribute to the enjoyment of an overall live or home performance.
Now, in the case of classical music, as a Philadelphian, I am fortunate that the Philadelphia Orchestra is just downtown. Both the orchestra and the venue -- the brand new, high tech Kimmel Center -- are world class top of the line. Nothing is better than taking in a performance at the Kimmel, with the company of my lovely wife (who by the way irrationally deeply hates and resents my stereo rig), sitting in nice comfortable seats located in the center of the orchestra section, and having a glass of wine at intermission. All followed up, of course, with a late evening snack at "Upstair at Varelli's" down the block after the concert. A real treat and musical experience!
Also very enjoyable is taking in a live performance of a one or more musican/vocalists at a local watering hole, while having a drink or cup of coffee with my wife either before or after taking in a flick. Very nice indeed.
On the other hand, I agree 100% with Elizabeth that going to a huge rock concert where the SPL is in excess of 120db and my ear wax liquifies -- is definitely not fun. Many years back, my wife and I took in an Elton John/Billy Joel concert. I had to stuff paper into my ears because the high SPLs were otically painful. Not so much fun.
So, in between taking in live performances of the type and genre described above, I very much enjoy the engaging and musical experience that my home rig provides. However, I do not delude myself by thinking that I have assembled a rig that reproduces music with the accuracy of "gain on a wire." OTOH, that doesn't mean that my rig doesn't provide me with a ton of enjoyment -- because it does!!!
Cheers and have a great July 4th weekend!!