Dealer behavior issue


I would like opinions as to whether members feel that I’m being unreasonable to think
that a very popular dealer has not performed so well on my behalf, the customer. Last summer I ordered an expensive ARC amp understanding that delivery would most likely be in Oct which was fine with me. I did make a commitment which I understand.
My situation seriously changed due to my wife’s health but I agree that’s not his problem.
At this point I requested to pay a handsome restocking fee, 2-3k, can’t remember the amount but he was cavalier saying why would I want to do this?
So that was that.
The unit is about to be delivered and as I’ll immediately resell the unopened box I gave him a last offer.
The transaction had a current unit model trade in that retailed for 8k and is a favorite product of his and he carries it.
Yesterday I offered to give him this unit as the restock fee with 90 days to fully refund me.
I have received no response so he didn’t like my offer which is his right. I have spent over 40k retail over the last two years with him with no problems.
So in the end I changed my mind which is the lowest form of audio behavior. Was I foolish to think this guy would accommodate me? The product I offered to GIVE him will fly out his door for $4k .
This is just business as usual ?
4425
It seems to me the dealer took your deposit and ordered the equipment.  He probably had to pay in advance.  Now for whatever reason, you do not want to finish with the deal and he does not have the cash flow to refund your money.  That's too bad and I would be upset.  Would the dealer be willing to sell the new item and pass the money back to you?

I would definitely call ARC and talk to someone in charge and relate the story.  Perhaps he can act as a middle man and help you out?
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paid by wire as i’m not worried about getting the unit in the future.,my distress is to be dissed over transaction. i think i’ll come out better reselling it but would give up the restock fee in order to not have to deal with it.,my hands are full elsewhere. 
stereo5. the dealer made the point that taking my unit back with or without restock fee would cost him the sale of another unit. that’s why i tried to discuss restock fees to soften the blow. he said why would i do that. i agree IF he feels that there are no circumstances in which he doesn’t have to extract max absolute dollars.
he’s absolutely opposed to me basically consigning it to him and getting repaid after he sells it. 
btw if i revealed the dealer you would be in disbelief as to whom i’m talking about. doesn’t matter