OP,
Learning to listen takes time. It is a big challenge. Music is constantly changing… instruments, notes, timing, etc. one’s mind focus workes by concentrating on one thing at a time… but with music, that is constantly changing and our memories for sounds are not that good. So, this creates a difficult problem when comparing equipment. If the difference is big… not a problem, but if subtle it is much harder.
With experience, one learns the nomenclature of describing sound, and as you perceive and understand sound you can then be able to discern greater and greater subtlety.
Professional reviewers take notes because they are able to discriminate among dozens of variables. It’s like the number of terms Eskimo have for kinds of snow (true or not). Novices have a hard time discriminating and describing sound. What ever it takes to get your arms around different equipment is part of the learning experience. This relentless pursuit to understand sound reproduction is what allows you to master it. Keep at it, you are doing great.
For me. After a brief listen, which helps me identify any major different characteristics, I just listen to whatever it is for a week. Then switch, for a week. I know what my system sounds like. I listen to it 3 1/2 hours a day… every day. The more subtle characteristics come out over time.. they are processed by my subconscious… the more powerful side of your brain. A good way to look at your mind is the elephant and the rider… the elephant is your subconscious and the rider is you conscious mind (the dialog in your head).
Anyway, I know a number of very experienced audiophiles. We can very quickly identify differences between components with complete accuracy in minutes… blindfolded or not, since most of us close our eyes when we listen anyway. There are people that can hear, identify, and characterize I will never hear or understand. The more you try the better you get.