If you're wanting to stick w/monitors to match your gear and buy new, consider Klipsch Heresy. A used pair of Tannoy Stirling or Eaton would sound fabulous, too, and match well, but might be a little large for your wife although they're elegant and furniture-like if that's your bag. I liked them both and they're easily driven by your amp.
Vandersteen mate well w/pretty much anything except your wife. Dynaudio and Totem monitors are exceptional but your Primaluna won't have the power to open them up.
Having owned all the above and held the same considerations, the Klipsch stand a good chance of making you both happy. Having written that, I picked up a pair of Daedalus Athena v2's for 3500 and they're not leaving anytime soon even in the face of some initial lamentations and protests from my wife. In the end, though, she's happy to see the parade of cartons having come to a close....temporary as that may be give our collective predilection!
