"I ended up buying blind/deaf..."
The only way to beat this problem is to buy from a seller offering return privileges. There is no other way. I know this is not something that everyone wants to do, but especially if the purchase is for an expensive item why accept the risk of having no recourse? Also, once you have established a track record with a seller, they are happy to do it. They know you, know you are serious, they value your business. When I hesitated about my last phono stage, Conrad-Johnson sent me their new ART Phono on spec without hesitation. This is a ~ $28,000 item. Showed up without so much as a credit card, nothing. My dealer facilitated that and of course I bought it. They knew I very likely would once I heard it, but this was a brand new unit that required break in for crying out loud. No worries I was told, take what ever time is needed. Is it any wonder I am a loyal customer? So, find vendors you trust, be a good customer, don't jerk them around and expect and you will get in home privileges so you do not have to make major decisions blind.