Drums are the primary reason I listen to vinyl. Even on a modest system they have better dynamics and are warmer and more realistic sounding than on digital. Dialing in just the cymbals is tricky as it is highly dependent on how they were recorded. Mic placement, the mic and preamp make all the difference.
Assuming they are well recorded and still sound harsh, it could be the room. A bright live room contributes enough reflection to make them sound ringy. Sorry but there's no power cord in the world that will fix that. My rule of thumb is if they sound good on headphones, they should sound good in the room. If not, room treatment is a wise place to start.
recording. Room reflections