You know you're an audiophile if--

.... To truly be an absolute undeniable audiophile......... YOU MUST MAINTAIN ABSOLUTE DENIAL OF ANY SUCH CONDITION! Just say the word Audiophile out loud , it is monotone and lacking emotion and sounds like phonic enunciation ..Now say Denial( too yourself), it has lower octave attack and swings too airy highs that cascade down to warm musical midrange with soft natural decay.....No , their is no such thing as an audiophile. Cheers

Your equipment is "analogue" rather than "analog".

Your partner says they are feeling 'horny', and you immediately look to see if they are touching your beloved speakers.

Hearing from your ex-girlfriend, "there is too much stereo stuff in this room--I really like those little Bose speakers" was a tipping point in your last relationship

and

Telling the current girlfriend "you can dance in between the speakers all you want, but please put down the beer cuz you are waving all over the amps", which she turned into a tipping point

Life is complicated sometimes.

You find yourself at a dinner party explaining why some people prefer the sound of records to CDs.