You know you're an audiophile if--

Re-reading positive reviews to assure yourself the gear you acquired is still worthy of inclusion or else ................................

My wife and I were hiking in a nearby nature preserve yesterday. It's spring and that's when all creature's spirits turn to the impulses of mating. Midways through the hike, we crossed paths with one particularly large male alligator who was calling for a mate and staking out his turf. The sound was so deep and intense, we both thought it was heavy machinery at first. Sounded like a ore hauler diesel running at lower than idle speed with no muffler system! Of course, I immediately marveled at how deep and pure the bass was and how even the best subwoofer systems would have difficulty reproducing it accurately.

...you keep an extra fuse in your waistband.

You never throw away "spent" tubes.

You make anyone who enters your listening room wear a blindfold.