but your post also prompts a memory of a fellow banker who went into Bergdorf Goodman in midtown NYC with his slinky new younger girlfriend and was treated badly by the salesperson, he thought because he was wearing torn jeans.Slinky new young girlfriends on the arm of a banker carry no less social stigma than does a pitbull on the opposite end of the leash from a skinhead. We're designed to size people up at the surface, so rare is the occasion you will find someone willing to look beyond it. The truth is that unless your friend asks why he got lousy service, he can only presume the reason. If without asking he believes it's because of the torn jeans and slinky babe, then he's already atuned to the image he's presenting, don't you think? You've just described the game, as his disguise belies his ability to plunk down $100K on the Amex.
I agree with what you're saying. There are some woefully inadequate salespeople in this industry, and unfortunately so given the pristine nature of the product they sell. In the end, however, I think it just comes down to communicating what you want. And no, not everyone is selling on your terms. But if you want to cut through the BS, just don't bring it to the table in the first place.