Wife Acceptance Factor

Don't get my original post wrong BTW. I'm happily married (if that tired cliche really exists as more than an oxymoron...). My wife knows how much I spent and on what. My system is only around $25-30K (will be around or over $30k when I upgrade the TV). I have my own private office/listening room in the basement that is around 40 ft by 20 ft in size, give or take (more than half is my listening room home theatre space). I do have to compensate my wife for making my resent purchases, but admittedly her requests were not nearly as expensive (but it is all money I brought to the marriage, which is why she is not unreasonable about it). She is not happy about the things I have bought, but she lives with it. I didn’t sneak around, but I certainly didn’t advertise, though I never lied about it when asked.

I started out by saying, "most of the women who are wives in my area", because it is true for most women I have met, and what I said about men is true about most men I have met. Actually, I am exaggerating; most of the men I have met are whipped and afraid to stand up for a few privileges in the houses that they pay for, as per the reclining chair example. Not compromising enough to let your husband have one chair he enjoys sitting in, in the den no less, is sadistic IMO, especially since it can be upholstered to match any decor. Albeit my wife has the rest of the house and picks everything, but I still have recliners in the den!

Let's face it most (not all) women just don't get the audio thing. My wife just thinks I'm half nuts when I get the upgrade bug. I try tp make sound, thoughtful purchases that don't waste money by usually buying used equipment. We have had some interesting "discussions" over the years but I'm usually creative in finding a way to make it work. To be fair I don't get the shopping trips for clothes, shoes etc. that in a couple of years end up in the donation pile to the local charities. Go figure.

I suggest that all unmarried guys print this entire thread and give it to their girlfriends, fiances and any other woman that they might live with in the future. After reading this, they will see how serious you are and that there are many other men that share your passion. She will see all of the shennanigans that some men have gone through to try and satisfy their thirst for this hobby.

Tell her that you'd like to continue in your hobby in the same fashion as before marriage and would not like to have to resort to some of the things that the previous posters have done. If she buys in......good for you. If she hesitates or says no.....you have a decison or a compromise to make, and you'll have to live with it for a long time.

You married guys may want to give a copy of this thread to your wives too.....it probably won't do any good and it's probably too late now, but at least they'll probably get a better understanding of how important this is to some guys and the lengths they go to in order to pursue this hobby.

Reply to Mitch4t:

Just put it in the prenuptial. She might lie!

Being single, I don't know, but has it ever happened.. even once, where a guy is thinking about buying a nice amp, and his wife says; "You know honey, that amp is sweet, but why don't we just buy some new mono blocks. I think our Vandersteen 5A's would sound better and we'd be less likely to upgrade in a year." ..maybe that's what it will be like in Heaven.