Broke and still not happy

I think if you experiment with interconnects and power cables you might be able to get the sound you want. The best way to do this is contact the Cable Co. and rent a bunch of cables. Cardas cables have a warm signature that might work for you. Try Cardas Neutral Reference from your preamp to poweramp. If that one isn't warm enough, try Cardas Golden Reference. Audience AU24 is also a basically neutral cable that can help with aggressive highs.

Cardas and Shunyata power cables also can warm up a system. You may lose a little in the way of high frequency dynamics but they can definitely warm up the midrange. Try the Cardas Golden Reference PCs on your power amps and a Shunyata Python Alpha on your preamp. Your DAC may benefit from a shielded PC, also.

One thing is for sure, we all have opinions. Some cables can be a bad match, but I do not think they are the problem. System synergy is very important, it is clear that you have some very good gear, but maybe they are not a good match for each other. Furthermore, from what I have READ, no experience, the speakers you have may not be the best for the music you like to listen to.

The headphone idea is good if possible, but also if you have access to other gear, swap out pieces until you find something that may be the cause for lack of synergy.

I would suggest a tube amplifier. Consider an ARC VT100 or SF Power 2. I experience the same feeling from time to time and it almost always goes back to crappy digital recordings. It is amazing how bad most popular music is recorded. In fact, the better the equipment, the worse it will sound (to me). Only the best recordings and audiophile "weanie" recordings are listenable. Perhaps you should go back to vinyl. What you are describing sounds like source problems. Your digital gear is quite good.

I wouldn't look past the tubes in your pre. You may have some tubes that don't work well in the preamp and/or sounds like the ringing sound could be microphonics.

Get rid of the active preamp and get a passive. Experiment with cables, try some Cardas Golden Cross and Cardas Golden power cords.
Amps like Mark Levinson would make it worse..
Try out an amp like Rogue 88 or Air Tight...
I myself have walked into some shops and heard extremely expensive systems, only to feel that they were sterile and dry, lacking body warmth and maybe even a little too clean.