This is so different from the brick-and-mortar days when I had my shop. We actually almost demanded that the customer take the item home and listen to it before buying, especially for high-dollar items. I might mention that some manufacturers back then did little to support our philosophy, but it was the only way I felt honest about my business. An unhappy customer was simply not going to result from being "stuck" with a component that did not work in their system--not on my watch, anyway.
Were we taken advantage of? A few times, but every Christmas when I sent out the cards, I would "fire" a few customers due to various reasons. We always "suggested" that they would be better off at someplace else that would "better meet their goals." Typically, these goals included
paying less than cost for items and not understanding why we had to charge anything at all for some things. Customers are very interesting...
With the new shipping paradigm, I feel for you all. Shipping was a HUGE expense back then and remains so today. Given the prices for many key components today, I would still want to listen to them IN MY ROOM before plunking down cash for a final sale. I guess our "hobby" just got more expensive, and it seems that some manufacturers are stepping up and working with their direct customers to make it happen. I still say a brick-and-mortar shop is your best bet IF you are near one. Cheers!