Dealer behavior issue


I would like opinions as to whether members feel that I’m being unreasonable to think
that a very popular dealer has not performed so well on my behalf, the customer. Last summer I ordered an expensive ARC amp understanding that delivery would most likely be in Oct which was fine with me. I did make a commitment which I understand.
My situation seriously changed due to my wife’s health but I agree that’s not his problem.
At this point I requested to pay a handsome restocking fee, 2-3k, can’t remember the amount but he was cavalier saying why would I want to do this?
So that was that.
The unit is about to be delivered and as I’ll immediately resell the unopened box I gave him a last offer.
The transaction had a current unit model trade in that retailed for 8k and is a favorite product of his and he carries it.
Yesterday I offered to give him this unit as the restock fee with 90 days to fully refund me.
I have received no response so he didn’t like my offer which is his right. I have spent over 40k retail over the last two years with him with no problems.
So in the end I changed my mind which is the lowest form of audio behavior. Was I foolish to think this guy would accommodate me? The product I offered to GIVE him will fly out his door for $4k .
This is just business as usual ?
4425
Many years ago I had a similar scenario with a local dealer. I had bought a lot of gear from this guy..always at full retail. One day I walked into his store and was looking at a couple of records. His sales person asks me if I am going to keep looking at the records or am i going to be buying something; he then tells me if I am not buying something to get out of the store! With that, i ask for the manager/owner...whom i had always bought from. I get the same basic response from this guy...buy or leave! So, guess what, i left and never came back. After a few years, the dealer went into insolvency and closed his doors. For some reason, I get some pleasure out of that.
If I were the OP, I would take the amp, resell it for whatever I could get for it...and make sure that I never dealt with this dealer again...and made sure that all in my sphere did exactly the same thing.
I imagine there are some customers that make selling stereos a little less fun. No matter how much they spend . Not saying the OP is one of these but perhaps the store owner is feeling a little taxed in the helpful and courteous department.  
@davekayc  Perhaps. But then the dealer didn't have to take the order(s) (make the sale) from the customer in the first place...nobody required him to do that. 
This dealer is a greedy pud. You need to expose him I was a dealer 
for a number of years. Did he give you ar least 15% off  as a good dealer would for example, besides Thst he made a lot of money 
as a restocking fee was more then fair . Expose this person to save others the hassle  and Never recommend this one .it is people like him that are bad for Audiophiles. Buyers are his life’s blood .A little empathy would have been nice .his dirty deed should not go unpunished ,for it showed a total lack of respect for you and your wife ,your offer was most generous. Screw him and the high horse he wrode in on. I sold a lot of gear your gear was upper end he makes around 50% markup . In the long r
lost ,for you will never do business with him again , and expose 
what dealer did this to save others. A true Audiophile wouldnot 
have acted like that like myself I would have worked out something with you on friendly terms knowing you would recommend me to others, and possibly to buy  something in the future . By saying nothing to fellow Audiophiles will allow this 
parasite to keep negatively hurting the good name of Audio .
best to you  and I hope you wife gets well.