About Lugnut -- Patrick Malone

Patrick,
I think you know from my stories how much you have come to mean to me. Though in some ways this has been brutal it has also been beautiful and I feel honored that I have been able to participate in it in a small way. We will all someday travel your path and I thank you for showing us the way.

I just stumbled onto this thread recently. Stunning. I am not sure what impresses/moves me more - that Lugnut (great name) is sharing his experience or that people are here hanging with it. I mean, mortality is something we usually try to put in the closet and hope it doesn't get us. Oops. And instead, people on this thread are talking about maybe the most mysterious aspect of life. With a guy who is fully conscious of his mortality and who is writing about it, out loud, publicly, in its mental, physical and spiritual dimensions, in technicolor and surround sound.

Ladies and gentlemen, this is extraordinary. On an audiophile forum, no less.

One little add. I work in the medical field. I was at a conference last weekend focused on breast cancer, dealing in part with the quality of breast cancer survivors' lives, post treatment. The presenter's data was that the quality of life for those whose treatment was surgery and/or radiation was essentially the same as the rest of the population. But those women who had had chemotherapy (meaning a more serious cancer) reported a higher quality of life than the population. This is a paradoxical finding, because chemo is no treat. I suspect it is because women who are given chemo really have the veil lifted to their ordinary denial of their mortality, and as a result, experience a spiritual response to this heightened awareness, as if we all know a depth equal to the event.

Not just for Pat, but for all of us: may we find our way to love, itself.

Hi Pat:

Your last post just takes one's breath away Pat. If you have time and strength to "post some thoughts I (you) have on our passion of audio," as you mentioned above, I'd love to hear your refections on the topic.

And re your comment above that "this particular post is important enough that I'd like to think you guys will save it to a word document for future reference".....well, I'm sure the entire thread is downloaded into harddrives and hearts all around.

A tune that was playing last night as I checked into this thread but really didn't have the courage (is that the right word?) to post.

A tune by Warren Zevon, the first verse goes goes....

"Shadows are falling and I'm running out of breath
Keep me in your heart for awhile

If I leave you it doesn't mean I love you any less
Keep me in your heart for awhile

When you get up in the morning and you see that crazy sun
Keep me in your heart for while

There's a train leaving nightly called when all is said and done
Keep me in your heart for while

Sha-la-la-la-la-la-la-li-li-lo
Keep me in your heart for while"

A long while I'm sure.
Godspeed Pat.

I remain,
Clueless

Since my post of 10-19 my head has been reeling from the respones. Springbok, your post brought me to the point of sobbing uncontrollably several times. Honestly, it must have taken me an hour to read through it. To think that another human being thinks enough of me to post such thoughts moved me to a place I've never been before, even though (AGAIN) such praise is undeserved from my perspective. Mysteriously, I think I needed that crying session but don't ask me to explain. It's a very good feeling to know I'm thought of so highly. So, I guess I really did deserve to be drafted into the Springbok team?

Wdi, I am a believer and have expressed it here numerous times. This thread is connected to a supernatural power in such an obvious way that it's given me hope that everyone who reads this is moved closer to their own sprituality. Funny. Nobody has been critical of my witnessing here. Isn't that kind of supernatural in itself? Again, the message contained herein is a gift to everyone. It's not about me, music or you guys even though we are the active participants. We are being shown how to treat one another the way God intended. We are being provided with insights into an area where we cannot go and come back. Sugar Mountain has taken on a larger meaning with your mention of it and Neil's latest album, Praire Wind, and the song If God Made Me. I feel that song was written for my personal needs.

Jsonic, You have picked up on what has been nagging at me for some time and that is the need for this message to survive for as long as possible and shared with however many are drawn to it. (And no, I'm not at all bothered by being placed in the past tense. I've already gone through that shock in doing so myself awhile back. Yeah, I reacted strongly to it at that time but not anymore.) I don't know how best to do it. Many months ago I said that a book should be written and said that anyone is free to tell this story in any form. The fact that I'm a username is good. I'm pretty sure that the power that has influenced all of us will not die when I do and that someone will be moved to share it. Of that I'm confident and leave that in the hands of He that is directing this.

Steve, I'm pretty sure that I posted my own story about my father being in the process of dying and how I carried him to get an IV at a nearby medical facility. He was given another month of life by my action but paid dearly for it. I too have felt a lot of personal guilt for doing it but after witnessing how that extra time was put to such good use I've realized that Dad wouldn't have had it any other way. His last unresolved issue was brought before him and laid to rest. Be at peace because it is what it is.

Ted, you and I cried together at RMAF in your showroom. LOL. I wonder what all the other folks thought! Just kidding because you and I know that this was our time to be what God wants us to be with each other. I'm glad I got the chance to meet you and experience the size of your heart.

Ccryder, your last sentence says it all.

Okay Clueless, here goes. Gentlemen light your torches! I'll try to explain my ideal approach to what we enthusiasts are attempting to accomplish. I do need to qualify who it pertains to though. It doesn't include gear heads for the sake of being gear heads. You know, the folks that have had more pieces of gear than pieces of music.

I was so lucky to have grown up when I did, coming of musical age in the sixties. Luckier still to have an older sister and brother that shared their music with me before I developed my own path to travel on. Even my parents were influential playing their music from my very beginning. Mainly, my siblings and my parents were doing this for their own enjoyment and I just was tolerated. Still, I appreciate the experience.

A lot of you can probably relate to my connection of music and events through my life. The music has its own impact on me but is also profound in how it brings up the emotions when I first heard it. I love that way of measuring my life rather than counting the days. I'm really thankful that I wasn't concerned at all about the audiophile attributes of those recordings. If I'd been burdened with that stuff I would never have gained any real love for what was being created.

I've spent a lot of seat time listening to live music. At lot of it has been amplified. But I've listened to live unamplified music in many different environments. Symphony, small intimate theatre, outside, club, motel room and in my home. I'm an okay acoustic player and know exactly what my guitars sound like in total solitude. I know what it's like to listen to my voice recorded or that weird place of singing to oneself listening from inside and out at the same time.

I love detail, resolution, texture and tonal balance as much as anyone. Finding a black background where all of this springs forth from is the path toward inner and outer detail as well as hearing the leading edge of notes and their proper decay. Having these attributes in our systems is what it's all about but I fear few realize the danger of taking it too far and if taken far enough all of that great music we love from our earlier days becomes unplayable or at the very least uninteresting. I think it's time we admit this line exists or we risk losing that precious childish nature we have for the pure joy of the song.

I've known this for a very long time but rarely voice this opinion to other enthusiasts for fear of offending. Maybe it's more a function that I don't want to be rejected. Whatever. Technological advances have taken us beyond any reasonable definition of enough in this regard. It seems to be the holy grail but comes at the expense of musicality and IMO destroys what it is we are trying to do.

I've listened to systems that just blow my own system away if measured by the standards listed above. Funny thing is, when those systems are playing I enjoy them more when a crowd is there and there is talking. Background noise. Interference. Traffic. It's all part of the mix too. Too much of the details just makes me ooh and aah the tiny things so that I'm constantly critically evaluating. No joy for me there at all. I'm not being picked up and carried away.

For sure, there is a need I have for ear candy from time to time. In my own system I most enjoy the best recordings I have being played while in the company of others with light banter going on. Even the furnace or AC coming on is okay with me. That's much closer to real for me when compared to the live experience.

By far my favorite time alone with my system is listening closely to those older, less respected records that move me. The deficiencies of the record are enough and I don't need the crowd to be with me to lessen all of those sonic nuances. I get picked up and carried away and only set back down again when the stylus is in the run out grooves.

Some of us are way too impatient. We change gear at a pace that is accelerated and I see where the acquisition of software is similar in a search for the same goals. IMO, it becomes more artificial when taken this far as compared to how artificial it was listening to my cars am radio when I first learned to drive.

Craig, what I'm getting at is we need to take live experiences to the plate but we shouldn't be guilty of removing the other aspects of what live really is. It includes other spectators breathing, coughing and talking, the rustle in the seats, air systems, etc. I've yet to hear the resolution at a live event that I hear in many systems except on very rare occasion of usually a single instrument. Even my humble system can be too revealing at times.

Man, I hope I haven't pissed anyone off. In all fairness the one thing that is missing now that I valued so much way back is radio. If we had great radio then maybe we would be buying more music that picks us up and carries us away now. Software is where it's at.

Spirituality, indeed defines this thread. A higher power gave Paul the initiative to start this thread a year ago. It was fate that brought Pat into my life, I responded to something he said on another post about souls. Love continues the progression of this thread and with little doubt will continue it in most of our lives forever. Once we learn how important love for each other is, how could we go back?

“Imagine there’s no religion, it isn’t hard to do…” John understood the spirituality being shared here. There are no rules being place upon our love here. There is no judgment being place on the words we share, only love. This is God; He is here, teaching every one of us through an experience we share through Pat’s life.

Future interactions will happen, and they will be forever altered by this thread. I doubt it will be confined in this thread, I expect it will permeate every aspect of each of our lives. This is God’s work. We need no religion telling us how to love one another or share an experience together. This is spirituality and no matter what we are taught by man, this will carry through all religions, for this is love, and our souls are love.

As years pass, we will never forget the lessons learned from Pat’s experience. Pat, you will never die, and the people you have touched will never be the same. Our job, as we proceed into the next chapter of life is to carry what we have learned to everyone we meet. If we truly feel the love and spirituality shared here, and if our lives really have been changed, than it is not possible to go backwards. God is love, and the love we share here is God. If we keep Pat in our hearts, his life will permeate thousands of other lives. The fact that this is an international forum means many religions, many beliefs; many backgrounds have found a common feeling, love. Share this every day, and the world will change.

Imagine

Imagine there's no heaven,
It's easy if you try,
No hell below us,
Above us only sky,
Imagine all the people
living for today...

Imagine there's no countries,
It isn’t hard to do,
Nothing to kill or die for,
No religion too,
Imagine all the people
living life in peace...

Imagine no possessions,
I wonder if you can,
No need for greed or hunger,
A brotherhood of man,
Imagine all the people
Sharing all the world...

You may say I’m a dreamer,
but I’m not the only one,
I hope some day you'll join us,
And the world will live as one.

Written by: John Lennon
© Bag productions Inc.

Thanks Pat, I love you…