How do I keep my cats off my amplifier?

Cats like a smooth surface to rest upon. Place any object (framed pictures, plants, books, vases, etc.) on top of the amp that breaks up the smooth surface should prevent the cats from reposing. Just take care not to block the air vents. Also, periodically vacuum inside the amp. The problem you really want to prevent is the cat throwing up into the amp's interior. It's highly corrosive and very hard to fully clean up.

A canvas sack, a bunch of rocks and a cool stream. : )

I have two cats, and a dedicated listening room in my basement. The two are mutually exclusive.

Would you consider a bald cat? 8^)

I've got a dog, and a BB gun. The BB gun works better on the cat. I don't think the Airzooka packs enough punch.

I must say, I like the "big stick, rusty nail" approach. Why do yuo people always do this to me when I'm drinking!

When I was in college, my friend's cousin had a problem with a neighborhood cat that would sit on his warm car during the night. He had a pet scorpion, and one night he left it on the roof of his car secured by a string. Apparently, he and his friends waited and watched for the cat to arrive. And when it did, it did what any curious animal does. It crawled up to the strange thing with the six legs and long tail on the roof and put its nose right up to it. The next thing the guys saw was the limp cat sliding off the roof. It sounds like a made up story to me since most scorpions don't have instant kill powers, but maybe the small size of the cat relative to an adult human had something to do with it. Hell, if Steve-O from Wild Boyz can take two scorpion stings in a row on his bare ass, why can't a cat take one on the nose?

My friend here at work told me his brother had a similar problem with a cat sitting on his car. He used a slightly different method. He left a small bowl filled anti-freeze on the hood of the car as a treat. It's known that ethylene glycol can kill small animals. He never had a cat problem again.

I have an even more demented idea. Get a bottle of "Jumbo-Gro" plant grow formula and feed it to a canary, then place the all-growed-up little fellar by your amp. There's nothing funnier than the sight of a dog-sized canary putting a cat in a leglock! Obviously I watch too much Tex Avery cartoons.