You need a dedicated listening room for guests like that. Must contain:
A pool table
A pair of Bose 901s hung by chains from the ceiling and run with a 6’ high rack full of cassette decks, equalizers, tuners, amplifiers with lots of pretty lights. Buy them for next-to-nothing at yard sales, Goodwill, etc.
A beer fridge full of Coors Light
Big bags of Cheezies
A big TV, hung way up high (out of the way of the beer, slobber and orange fingers)
A kiddie area with lots of toys and cell phones to play with
...put them all in there and lock the door and let them out when it’s time for them to go! They might not even want to leave!