Don, sorry for your challenges.
So the first list refers to the four gain settings of your phono stage and the overload margins for each one. The second set has an asterisk, but you don't provide the info attached to it.
At any rate the sensitivity is the amount of input signal from your cartridge needed to achieve a pre determined output signal. Usually 2 or 3 volts.
IMHO, the 1mV output of your cartridge is kind of a tweener. I would try both the 40db setting, and if noise, or diminished dynamics was an issue, I would move up to 64db, and pick whichever sounded better. You will do no damage by using either one, it is strictly the sound quality that you prefer that should guide your choice. Good luck!