mother passed away - pro recording help needed


i don't know how to write this request without sounding pathetic but my mother of 62 just passed away due to a misdiagnosis and a horrible hospital mistake (many, in fact.) I'm an artist (mostly dramatic writing but also in various versions of performance art) and i have been breaking down in the most random situations because of my sorrow. I've never been witness to such grief and i think it's worth documenting (for incorporation in some later work, i'm not sure what yet.) i'd like to record myself in these moments and want the best possible sound but it must be portable since i never know when i'm going to freak out. can someone please recommend some system including a mic? I don't like mp3 or minidisc. is there something better? a dat, maybe? regardless, i'm not able to research anything under the circumstances so a detailed recommendation including all the gear i need (including prices for used and new, if possible) would be very much appreciated.

I know others have gone through tragic loses but i hope all others reading this escape such an experience. there are no words to describe the sadness. my mother, like most mothers, was a beautiful person and i'll never be the same without her.

thank you,
dennis

p.s. please excuse me if i don't answer responses or express thanks for them...it's very hard for me to just exist right now but i will certainly be appreciative of any help, whether i'm able to respond it here or not.
kublakhan
Dave (Sogood51), I cannot fathom the pain of your loss. I am so terribly sorry to hear you are going through this. Such things hit all of us eventually amd we can find a little bit of peace through our shared humanity here and with friends and family but the true healing is a solitary process. My heart goes out to you.
God Speed Dennis, I cant imagine what you are going through but I will have a good thought for you and your Mother.
Dennis-
If making some sort of documentation of this is helpful to you then I wish you luck finding what you need here. I do not think you are pathetic. It would be nice to get some distance from such grief, and perhaps recording would allow for that, at least for a time. If not, dont forget those around you. You are not alone if you do not want to be. you are not alone here.
Dennis- What a great testimony of your love for your mother- that will never die. I hope that music can soooth your soul in your grief. Many of our best muciscal friends have been deeply moved in their own losses and left records (excuse the pun) of their own journeys, to help us in ours.

Grace and Peace,

Jim
with the utmost respect: your mother's essence will live on, both in you and through you. you will see aspects of her in your children someday, and this will make you smile and remember those things about her you held most dear. others in your family will point out in you those wonderful characteristics of hers that you learned or inherited. i lost my own mother on april 30th after a long senescence and was priveleged to be the one with her when she passed. as a physician practicing a far from perfect profession i offer my sincerest condolences given the unfortunate circumstances that led up to her untimely demise. i offer a humble prayer for her, and also for you in your time of need.