Girlfriends and wifes, how do YOU cope?

I subscribed to various audio magazines and was an enthusiast for the first 16 years of our marriage without moving away from my system that I bought in college (which was nothing to write home about). During the last four years, Katie bar the door! My wife and I jointly auditioned many different speakers and amps in our home (the kids too!). She absolutely noticed the difference and we agreed on the best set-up. During the last two years or so, oh boy did we go through a lot of upgrades. Lately, I generally did the research alone but often was able to audition before buying. This made all the difference because audio differences are really not all that subtle once you actually pay attention.

Since my wife runs the finances I don't hide anything, nor do I want to. Great sound costs more and is a constant search. It's more fun when you don't do it alone. Which is why I involve my family and why I enjoy everyone at Audiogon. BTW, I wouldn't recommend the 16 year approach to anyone just starting out; things just happened that way, but I do remind her of all the money I saved during that time. Cheers.

Albert, that is how HE seduced me into this madness.... He gets the 2 channel, I get the HT....

Besides, this ONLY works on women..... men are easy in this hobby... they get it right away.....

I've attempted (successfully, I think) to get my wife used to the fact that gear is going to occassionally come and go, that the experimentation is part of the fun, and that just because boxes show up occassionally doesn't mean that it's all expenditure, because I've sold many pieces as well, usually at a little less or a little more than I paid. I'm the wage earner in the family and do all the finances, so until I start telling her that we can't afford music lessons for the kids or something because I just bought a new amp, she remains pretty flexible. I thought I was going to really test her limits, though, when I shipped an amp to DSSMAN a few weeks ago with the now-famous results. Amazingly, she took it all in stride even after I told her the amount.

One thing that I think helps a lot is that all the gear is in it's own room - if I was trying to set something up that took up much space or was really visible in the living room, I would hear about it from that side. Since it's my room and my hobby and she realizes she's got it pretty good with me, I pretty much get to do my own thing.

I do wish I could draw her into it occassionally though, as I do with my daughter who is a budding cellist. Here is this wonderful sounding system, right in their own house, available to use almost at will, and they NEVER touch it. I've learned to settle for apathetic even if I want enthusiastic, because it beats hostile by a large margin :-) -Kirk

My wife has started using the system more, when I am out (which is a good thing). I think that she was afraid of the tube amp in the beginning, but I told her that if anything goes wrong, we will just have it repaired, just like anything else. The only instructions that she has are to give it 15 minutes to warm up and in the event that sound stops coming from one of the speakers, to then shut off the source (on occasion one of our cats has clipped one of the speaker cables). She has even started to use the special CD mat that I made up with the Peter Belt Rainbow Foil as she likes what it does to the sound. I don't know if is more fun to share or if sharing helps to diminish some of the guilt for all of the money that I have spent, but either way I am glad that she enjoys it. I also get a kick out of my godson visiting and doing an antler dance in front of his friends when operating the system.