All I can say from having spent quite a lot of time with Pat is that he would be ashamed that you so speak so callously to a community of which you are a member. Compassion and understanding is not conditional, and yet you make it so. Next time you want specific responses, fill them in yourself.
I'm sorry for your loss, Nate, truly. And I'm sorry for your insensivity as well. Re-read your post again. It leaves all options available as far as responses go. If you don't realize that you live in a highly polarized nation, you are either not paying attention, not asking questions, or simply too busy labeling the idiots. Well, you can consider me one of them, and I'm grateful that Pat found it so easy to love me for it.