"Emotionally involving" music and your system...

Over the past 40 years, I've heard a lot of performances / concerts, and six that stand out in my mind for their emotional impact are:

1. 1957: Louis Armstrong and his All-Stars (with singer Velma Middleton), sharing a twin billing with the Count Basie Orchestra. The concert was held in the Carter Barron Ampitheater in Washington DC (an open air venue), and was my introduction to live jazz. Louis' group played first for about 90 minutes, then Count Basie and his Orchestra played for about 90 minutes, and then the two groups played together for another 90 minutes. What an evening!!
2. 1972: Roberta Flack in concert in Frankfurt, Germany. Flack appeared in an intimate hall built for chamber music that had terrific acoustics, and she delivered a superb performance.
3. 1973: Three Dog Night, also in concert in Germany (I was stationed there with the Army). This was, quite simply, the most enjoyable rock concert I've ever attended (I know, my age is showing...).
4. 1978 or 1979: the complete Wagner 'Ring' Cycle done by the Seattle Opera. The cumulative effect of the total 'Ring' cycle is nearly overwhelming, and far more compelling than hearing each of the component operas separately. If you like opera, you should experience the 'Ring' cycle in its entirety.
5. 1987 or 1988: Sonny Rollins did a concert in Seattle at the re-furbished Paramount Theater, and absolutely blew his ass off that night. On one tune (not sure, but it might have been "St. Thomas") he soloed for nearly 20 minutes in one of the most amazing virtuoso performances I've ever heard on any instrument.
6. 1994 or 1995: Jon Jang and his Pan-Asian Arkestra performing his composition "Tiananmeng Suite", dedicated to the Chinese people who were killed in Tiananmeng (sp?) Square. The performance was part of Seattle's annual "Earshot Jazz Festival". The Arkestra included some stellar performers, such as David Murray and James Newton, as well as some of the most extraordinary Chinese musicians playing traditional Chinese instruments. An absolutely riveting performance!

Two pieces have left me feeling overwhemlmed as you describe, and they're both by Shostakovich. The first one was the 2nd Piano Trio, performed by the Borodin Trio at Parry Sound, Canada in about 1992 or so. The other was a performance of the 14th Symphony done by the National Arts Centre Orchestra under Pinchas Zuckerman in Ottawa about a month ago.

Both performances compelled a total involvement with the emotions of the music, and left me feeling drained. But while the Trio gave me a feeling a bleakest despair, the symphony left me with a sense of paradoxical hope. Both were wonderful experiences that I'll always treasure.

The Grateful Dead, 10/9/89 Hampton Coliseum, Hampton, VA. The show was billed as "Formerly, The Warlocks". That night the band broke out Dark Star for the 1st time since 1984, Death Don't Have No Mercy for the second time since 1970, and Attics of My Life for the first time since 1972. The show was monumental and moving, but the best part was when the lights went on immediately after the show. Everyone suddenly saw everybody else and we all let out a collective scream at the top of our lungs for what we had just seen. It doesn't get any better than that, and if my system ever comes even close I'll be very scared.

Live music is almost always better because, I believe, you pick up the energy and dynamics of the musicians. That can't be done at home. For me, the following concerts hit home the closest regarding your question:

Bela Fleck (2001, Greensboro, Carolina Theatre) -- the live cd is great but can't approach the immediacy and energy of the live performance

Vladamir Horowitz (1977, Iowa City Hancher Auditorium) -- I sat to the left at eye level with the piano so could see him stroking the keys. Wow! A recording cannot duplicate that.

AC/DC (1995ish, Cleveland Colliseum) -- what can I say? The energy of that band has to be seen live to appreciate them.

Dave Brubeck (1998, Boston, Sanders Theatre, Memorial Hall) -- I sat on the stage itself. Holy moly! It was absolutely incredible.

Paul Sprawl (2003, the Garage, Winston Salem) -- this guy does stuff with his guitar you have to see to believe. His hands drum the acoustic guitar while he plays -- very complex, very musical. The cd is just not as much fun, though very good.

Live music and reproduced music are two different things.
The former is a time art;it exists on a time line and once performed,can never be duplicated. Perhaps that is part of the reason music is the most abstract art. The interplay among minds,of musicians and listeners,is unique to its moment.
Recorded music can be reproduced over and over but does not have the immediacy of a live hearing. Upgrading a system will not change that fact.

Two come to mind.

--Charles Mingus with the "Changes" era band at a small club.
--The Cleveland Orchestra playing the g minor Mozart symphony.