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why do so many discussions turn contentious?

just venting....why do so many discussion posts need to turn  contenious and nasty?  do you guys find that constructive and/or enjoyable?  I have no clue who or how this forum is moderated, but I sure would love to see a stop to that...it makes me feel like this hobby is dominated by total jerks.

Can't we play nice, share OPINIONS and OBSERVATIONS, realizing that  they often are subjective and biased.  
"if you dont have anything nice to say, say nothing"?  If you wish to disagree, do it in a constructive and mature fashion, no need for "argument ad hominem"...

with all the chaff, one must waste so much time finding the wheat, figuratively speaking.  

I doubt my writing this will change anything, but, like most social media, people writing to others without facing them does not bring out the best, sadly......



128x128jw944ts
rfnoise
153 posts
 
I joined a forum devoted to my other hobby several years ago. I’ve seen some pretty passionate debates there, but the site is closely moderated, and personal attacks, hostility, or pushing political agendas will quickly result in a suspended account or outright banning.

When I started building my system and joined this site, I realized what a great job they do over there at keeping the environment productive, positive, and conducive to shared enthusiasm.

Don’t get me wrong, I’ve gotten some great input from some of the members here, but the toxic behavior I’ve seen in certain threads is mortifying, and leads me to post less than I might otherwise.
mahler123
3,412 posts
 
There better on line sites, but there are also worse, as far as behavior.  It is reflective of society as a whole.  I remember being horrified when the Jerry Springer show was in its heyday.  There are now several generations who have been raised thinking that standard of behavior is the norm.  Couple that with the rise of the Internet, with its penchant for turning up the temperature at its anonymity.  Then, this site caters to males, and the tendency to compare expensive possessions as a way of validating our masculinity.
jw944ts's avatar
jw944ts OP
327 posts
 
+1 nonoise
         "This is turning into quite the soap opera with some over the top ham vying for the spotlight."

again, many valid points, how about...enough psychology, rhetoric, etc...this is not a contest to see who wins with the best answer, no more than this site is a contest to see who has the best, the most expensive or is the smartest.....let's all now end this and simply pledge to play nice, be respectful, remember the level of subjectivity of our hobby and  differing tastes. IF you wish to disagree, write like you were chatting face-to-face with a colleague and being polite.... 
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cleeds
6,017 posts
 
As we know, this thread is:
"why do so many discussions turn contentious?"
Here’s an entire post from our friend @georgehifi:
georgehifiNo no no!! that’s the new word for being a fuser "Pathetic"😵
There’s the problem.
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