Am I broken? Am I stuck? Do I have to return my audiophile card now?

Carpe Diem - If there is a deal there that allows you to do the move I would take it. Those opportunities don’t come up often.

Yes there is the "rare opportunity" thing, if that's the case.

I'm sure I'm not alone in still occasionally kicking myself in missing certain rare opportunities that are unlikely to come again.

And I've been extremely happy in TAKING rare opportunities that wouldn't come again.   For instance, I was always a fan of MBL omnis, which were way too expensive.  But I saw an add for a "rare opportunity to own MBL" in which an MBL speaker had been cosmetically damaged in shipping to a customer, and so it was being sold at less than 1/5 the price!  Even though I didn't have much money at the time, I stretched to grab those and was very glad I did.  I got to live with MBLs for a good 10 years!

Likewise, in years before a deal had fell through for a pair of Thiel 2.7 speakers in ebony.  I lusted after those things, loving the Thiel sound (I had big 3.7s I needed to replace) and LOVING the rare ebony finish that would match my decor.  I kicked myself for not getting those when they sold.   Thiel 2.7s were rare enough, but in ebony...super rare.  So when another pair finally came up years later I grabbed them.  So glad I did because they were everything I hoped, and just the right finish. And I've never seen them for sale since.

Then there are missed opportunities.  For instance I was gagga over some Waveform Mach Solo speakers that I once reviewed.  One of the best speakers I've heard in my home, in a gorgeous finish, but I let them go.  I thought about those speakers for years, and kept my eye on the used market.  But that model had been manufactured just when Waveform was going under, so they were essentially never on the used market.  About 17 years later a pair popped up for sale!  It was the last one Waveform ever built AND it was custom modded with better drivers by the manufacturer (was his own pair).  AND it was within driving distance local pick up.  AND it was at an INSANELY low price!   All perfect, right?  Except this occurred when I had a rare extended time out of work.  I just wasn't confident about spending any money at that moment, even though some work would eventually come.  So...I watched as they were eventually sold.  And...of course....work came not long after!    Still kicking myself....

I just went through a similar experience with home theater processors. I bought new and have been using a Lexicon MC-12 for years. I like the processor so much that I even bought a second one. I have tried to keep my system current and most recently I became interested in an Anthem AVM90 processor as a replacement for the MC-12. I pulled the trigger and bought the Anthem and I do like it but I also miss the MC-12. The AVM90 has the capability to play formats that didn't even exist with the MC-12 came out and it is -in part- with that in mind when I bought the AVM90. This hobby has ALWAYS presented one compromise after another and I believe it is the nature of this hobby to do so -  whatever choice you make there is always another step/improvement that will soon come to mind. Go for or stay with the speakers that - in the long run- will provide the most satisfaction. You have already said one speaker will never be as good as the other and that is something that is likely to keep coming to mind in the future.

Have you spoken with a therapist...might be good to get a firm grasp of this traumatic situation...keep us in the loop

@pmiller115

I have seldom ever experienced compromise in the pursuit of the high end in either my home theater or audio systems. There are some rules: always research the heck out of any purchase, and never spend less that twice as much on the next purchase.

I started building my audio system about fifty years ago… I had some mis-steps in the first couple years. But after I got my feet on the ground,,. That was the end of any compromised steps forward. I now own the very best main audio system and headphone system I have heard.
 

We (partner and I) reached a great home theater with flagship Meridian processors and top notch speakers and amplification about 18 years ago and have just been upgrading monitors since (Sony 77” OLED currently). While I am sure there is an opportunity to improve the processor at this point, when I do, it will be to, the forefront, and I doubt there will be any compromise.

I think my reference to compromise may have been misunderstood. What I meant was not compromise in the quality or cost of the equipment we buy and listen to but rather the compromise I think most of us understand we may be making, for example, when we sacrifice the amount of finite detail our equipment produces to achieve a more melodic and musical presentation of the music we listen to. You strive to achieve what is pleasing and this often means sacrificing one or more qualities in favor of other qualities that more sonically please us.