The Horror

@erik_squires + 1 - most of the rooms I've been at at audio shows try to compensate for poor room treatment with more volume. Louder will almost always sound better if it's not distorting. For me, having to hear Diana Krall or Nora Jones at regular volume is bad enough....  

You’re displeased because I had the sickening realization that there are major differences in what money buys you in this hobby.

Not even a little displeased. More like, surprised that you had any sort of revelation at a trade show. You’ve also come to very different conclusions than I have, so again, surprised, but if you want to be unhappy about your life choices I’m not about to get in your way.

Your original post, and this one, are very emotional but also very generic. What system would you say caused you to have such an epiphany? What speakers and system, how was the room set up, what did you hear and what are the actual sound characteristics you feel now you are missing?

As I read your original post, and the one above, what you seem to most be upset about is not being able to spend as much as you want to.  That's not the same as not being able to have a certain musical experience.

But like I said, I'm not about to get in your way of your tears.  Let them all out.

@roxy54 

You know, Roxy, I think you’re right,  the non-audiophiles in my life were always astounded when they heard my system. That helped a lot to give me succor and the  illusion that all was well.  That, and the sweat work and money I put into it, of course.  I was proud of my rig.  But I was living in my own bubble, and though I did audition the Maggies, mostly everything else I bought without demo, based on reviews, and reputation, certainly brand.  Not what I’m recommending  going forward.  As many here have stated many times, it’s different in your room. I guess, what I’m realizing is I’m getting a bit more experienced now, more knowledge, as someone here noted.  But it bites to learn the hard way.

@erik_squires 

Well, Eric, I certainly don’t know how else to measure  the quality of sound except to hear whats in front of me.  I sat down to listen to the speakers in the Gryphon room, the Vandersteen and the Boenicke rooms.  I did not know the price, I just listened.  Then I asked.  Then I knew.  They all were the sound I would call way better than mine.  Now, they all did not have perfect setups and rooms.  I thought the Gryphons needed more toe-in, and that the room was way too small.  The Vandys were spread far too apart for my liking and their highs were a bit biting.  The Boes were, well, perfect.  But I get it.  I just want expensive toys, baby can’t have them, Wah!!!!.  Right?  Or could it be I just want the best sound.  And that simply is  out of my reach.  

@audiodidact here is good part: you can get sound that you love (a lot more) by trying different speakers and amps and preamps and sources in your current budget. Members here will lend you gear and you can order it to try out and then buy it used. Of course you know it, you have been doing this for long.

I have bought a lot of cheap stuff on shopgoodwiill, had generous loaners or gifts from members here, and made amazing improvements on a small budget.