Nice post! I'm reminded of the cosmically inspiring moments I've had listening to a classical music station that's barely coming in while driving through the woods in a noisy car.
Is it the gear or the ears?
So as an absolute lover of music and the presentation of music in the most satisfying way possible; I am constantly amused about many Audiophile habits.
Having enjoyed many decades of fine music and costly audio gear, I am fascinated by folks having what appears to be amazing gear (certainly recognized to be) but
more often than not, unable to enjoy lasting satisfaction of what I can only imagine is a staggering amount of cash spent and usually lost in the buying and selling of costly gear.
I know more than a few folks (men) who over the years have enjoyed what I thought were incredible audio systems. But in each situation the common theme was always a brief period of great joy “the Honeymoon phase” (or so it would seem) followed by the desire to be rid of something (usually what was last purchased) for the next “best” thing.
Only it turned out to not be, and this pattern continues with thousands if not
hundreds of thousands of dollars spent, trying to find I suppose a sound (gear) that they can live with. This goes on for years, and I honestly don’t believe true joy and satisfaction is ever attained. Perhaps for a fleeting moment, usually (and this bears mentioning) the most excitement I hear from these people is ALWAYS the anticipation of that next new piece. Only to be sadly disappointed after a surprisingly short period of time. Rarely does the new piece ever live up to the expectations they hoped for.
I acknowledge that we all hear differently, and what might sound great to me, might be dreadful to another. But what I can never wrap my head around is, how the the person doing the searching and buying is initially overjoyed seemingly (the honeymoon phase) but soon it’s as if the “ bloom is off the rose” and they suddenly
can’t find something to replace it fast enough. Also it bears mentioning that, the other common characteristic is the audiophile is always telling me, “doesn't this
sound incredible!” As if they’re trying to convince themselves or get some validation. At any rate, I find myself in the awkward place of being that guy that
has to point out that, “it’s Your system! What I think should not matter”.
Apparently I am sorely mistaken, because highly educated grown men somehow can be easily swayed by a stranger, a salesman or anyone if the appropriate praise is not received regarding their prized system.
But what baffled me the most, is the sheer lack of these folks to actually enjoy the music! Rather, the disturbing pattern of analyzing every detail of what is either missing or is in excess, instead of simply Listening to the music and enjoying it.
Over the years, I have changed gear quite a bit, so I too am guilty of the above pattern. At one point I decided to “get off the merry go round” and just really enjoy the music. I am fortunate that I was able to put together a system for me that allows me to enjoy music like I never thought was possible for me. What I listen to now would scarcely be considered High End Audio except my Source Disc Player but everything else is quite affordable and if I do say so, every Disc I play sounds phenomenal to me. (And yes because I am listening to it, I care not about what anyone else thinks) There’s great freedom in resting in that. Especially since I am not financially able to drop the kind of cash that would be considered High End Audio, being on a fixed income as a Disabled Veteran. You see at some point I recognized that spending a fortune on gear and not being satisfied is truly sad.
However, spending a very small amount of money on your entire system and being absolutely overjoyed is truly a blessing!
I mean if you drop $150k on a power amplifier and it’s sounds great, well it dang well better! But my great joy is finding stuff that is affordable but exceeds my expectations! That is what I love in audio. I can appreciate everyone’s personal choice and taste in music, because music is a personal experience.
My point is, music is truly “my drug of choice” and I believe one of life's greatest blessings. So when my brother shared this article with me I felt moved to share it
in this forum, mostly for what I hope brings a little humor to this often overly way too serious “boys club” The Audiophile.
GOLDEN EARS ANONYMOUS: A 12-STEP PROGRAM FOR RECOVERING AUDIOPHILES
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Welcome, friends.
Here at Golden Ears Anonymous, we believe in second chances. Yes, even for those who spent months arguing about cable burn-in on internet forums. You’re not alone. Many of us here have fallen into the same traps—obsessing over imperceptible sonic details while forgetting to enjoy the music itself. Together, we’ll recover. One step at a time.
Step 1: Admit That You Can’t Hear the Difference
This is the hardest step for many. Look, we know you convinced yourself that your $10,000 diamond-encrusted interconnects made your music “warmer,” but the truth is… you have to let go.
Take Steve here, who once swore he heard “new details” in a completely silent test track. We applaud Steve for admitting it. Remember, acknowledging that the music doesn’t sound better just because you spent more is the first step to freedom.
Say it with us: “It’s not the gear; it’s the ear.”
Step 2: Make Amends with Family Members You Ignored While A/B Testing DACs
Many of us have alienated loved ones by prioritizing perfect sound over actual human connection. Take time to write apology letters. Here’s an example:
“Dear Mom, I’m sorry I missed your birthday because I was recalibrating my speaker toe-in. I hope this letter finds you well and that you’ll come visit now that my system is almost perfectly phase-aligned.”
Reconnecting with family may feel daunting, but remember—they still love you, even if your obsession with room acoustics pushed them to the brink.
“It’s not the gear; it’s the ear.”
Step 3: Sell Off Unnecessary Gear (or at Least Try)
We know parting with gear feels like losing a family member. “But what if I need my backup turntable?” you ask. Trust us—you won’t.
Put your most expensive cable on Marketplace, slap on a tagline like, “Handcrafted audiophile power cable made to reveal hidden microdetails while elevating your system’s soul to sonic nirvana.” Then watch as prospective buyers ghost you after realizing they’d rather pay rent.
“It’s not the gear; it’s the ear.”
Step 4: Learn to Appreciate Music Again
Let’s face it—when was the last time you actually enjoyed a song without obsessing over the noise floor? For this step, we challenge you to listen to a low-bitrate MP3 on a cheap pair of earbuds.
Yes, it will hurt.
But as one of our members said, “It was liberating to hear Bohemian Rhapsody without analyzing the sibilance on Freddie Mercury’s vocals.”
“It’s not the gear; it’s the…”
Step 5: Stop Reading Audiophile Forums
Step away from the forums. No, you don’t need to read another 4,000-word argument about the “sonic neutrality” of a $3,200 laser-etched SD card for storing FLAC files. These places are toxic echo chambers designed to fuel your addiction.
Welcome in Tim, who has proudly shared: “I haven’t typed ‘frequency response’ in six months!”
“It’s not the gear; it’s…”
Step 6: Embrace Imperfect Acoustics
Here’s a radical idea: music doesn’t need perfect acoustics to be enjoyable. To help you let go, we’ll take a field trip to a live concert. Yes, the reverb will be harsh, and the bass will be muddy. And yes, you’ll survive.
Pro tip: if you catch yourself whispering, “This room has unforgivable slap echo,” bite your tongue. Hard.
“It’s not the gear…”
Step 7: Accept That Good Music Can Be Played on Bad Equipment
Say it with me: “Good music is good music, even on a Bluetooth speaker.”
As part of this step, you’ll endure a group exercise where we play Dark Side of the Moon on a $20 portable speaker. No crying. No grimacing. Just vibing.
“It’s not the g…”
Step 8: Forgive Yourself for Past Audiophile Crimes
We’ve all committed regrettable acts. Maybe you spent your savings on cryogenically treated banana plugs. Maybe you threw shade at a friend for using streaming services. Whatever it was, it’s time to let go.
Let’s hear from Alan: “I once adjusted my tonearm mid-dinner party to impress a guest. I’m ashamed, but I’m moving forward.”
“It’s not the…”
Step 9: Learn to Enjoy Silence
Silence can be music, too. But silence doesn’t need a $5,000 noise-canceling treatment to be pure. Here, we practice sitting in an untreated room without analyzing the noise floor.
Remember: the only person judging you is Steve. And no one takes Steve seriously anymore.
“It’s not…”
Step 10: Rediscover the Joy of Shared Music
Music was meant to be shared. We encourage you to introduce a song to a friend without giving a 10-minute preamble about the soundstage or microdynamics.
Rule: no stopping the music to explain how your turntable’s anti-vibration feet “elevate the emotional nuance.”
“It’s…”
Step 11: Help Others on Their Journey
Once you’ve embraced recovery, it’s your duty to help others. Gently guide your friends away from destructive behaviors, like spending $800 on an HDMI cable “handwoven by Venetian artisans and tuned to the Fibonacci sequence for mathematically perfect cinematic texture.” Host interventions when necessary.
Remember: tough love saves wallets.
“It’s not…”
Step 12: Celebrate Recovery
Congratulations! You’ve made it. Now, let’s celebrate by listening to We Are the Champions on a clock radio.
As a token of your success, we’ll present you with your Golden Ears Chip: a commemorative award for “One Year Without Buying Snake Oil.”
“It’s not the…”
Step 13: Relapse
“It’s not the ear; it’s the gear.”
You swore you were done, but then you caught yourself browsing “audiophile-grade Ethernet cables” at 2 a.m. Oh no! Oh no no no! You were so close!
Closing Remarks
Recovery is a journey, not a destination. But as you leave here today, remember: music is about joy, not perfection. And if you ever feel tempted to fall back into old habits, just ask yourself: “Do I really need a $15,000 cartridge to feel something?”
Enjoy Your Music!
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- 48 posts total
- 48 posts total