Has it all been worth it?

I think it has been. I've been on this Merry-Go-Round for only about 25 years, so a lot less than many people here. But an important point to remember is that this hobby is for a very select few for whom auditory satisfaction is a source of contentment. We're also Gearheads to an extent and we just like tinkering with things. We get an aural pleasure that the vast majority of people don't really care about and find elsewhere. Having said that, as I've posted earlier, I restored, refinished, and rebuilt a very old pair of coral speakers several months ago and only the other night did I finally take them off my listening stands and put my reference 3A's back up. I just would have been very happy with these essentially free speakers as opposed to much more substantial (and more resolving and clear) De Capos. 

death is the only offramp and then….. ?

It has been in my case. The end result has well exceeded the endless search for the best sound to my ears in the best possible listening environment. It's obviously not for everyone. The commitment has to be real to get there. It's a great way to spend my time in retirement. I never gave it that much time and attention during my working life and the quality of my systems then would speak to that. 

Yes, because I no longer want anything. I understand that there will always be something better than what I have and I'm okay with it.

I am really sorry to hear about your journey. Mine has been similar in length and certainly intensity. However, I am retired and 73. My journey has been exactly the opposite. It represents the best investments I have ever made and has brought me endless joy along the way.

I traveled extensively throughout my career... first as a geologist when I would frequently spend 8 to 10 hours a day driving... so I had a top of the line headphone system for days (the Sony Walkman Brick with Dolby C), an amazing portable system for my motel room (three weeks in the field, one week home), and an evolving main system and record collection at home.

Later as an executive I traveled extensively globally and used my evolving portable headphone system. While further developing my home system.

Before retirement I did a big upgrade in case I could not afford another after... really great. Fortunately, after retirement I was able to do a much larger upgrade, achieving the sound I never thought possible. One key was in my fifties and sixties was season tickets to the symphony seventh row center that helped me calibrate my ears to real natural sound.

Now in retirement my system gets two or more hours of use and is one of my most prized and fulfilling time each day. The culmination of over fifty years of study and investment. This pursuit has been sooo rewarding. I am very fortunate.