About Lugnut -- Patrick Malone

Lugnut,

I admire you more amd more with every post you make... so insperational...though you don't know me I feel like I know you and and think of you often. The world needs more people like you not less.

Ron,

I've pondered who David Roth reminds me of and I can't think of a single successful singer/songwriter. He does remind me of several club performers I've heard in my life that couldn't get the crowd up and dancing and drinking til they fall down. His type is usually a one night stand in the club scene because the audience sits and listens. This guys music isn't going to be used to hawk tennis shoes, beer or credit cards on tv.

Bin,

Thanks for the compliment. I believe that, in a certain sense, it's more difficult to read my posts than to live them. I have no choice but to face my own mortality but you have CHOSEN to face it, and in doing so, your own.

This is the second type of cancer I've faced, the first being in '88. One of my high school classmates couldn't bring himself to even call me back then and has expressed numerous times of late how guilty he has felt about it. He now calls on a regular basis and the conversation always turns to God. We both believe in the traditional, Christian sense. During our last conversation he told me a long story about him wanting to minister to me so that I could have the gift of salvation. I'm aware that his church, and particularly his men's bible study group, prays for me and my family on a regular basis. He has shared most of our converstaions with his pastor and eventually this pastor said to him, "Paul, can't you see that he is ministering to you?". I could tell that he was near tears when he shared this with me. He went on to say that whenever he calls he feels closer to God. Bin, listen carefully here as I think it's important. I'm not ministering to anyone. Not intentionally anyway. If God is using me for a greater good I'm very happy for him doing so. From the beginning of this thread I've felt that this experience was bigger than audio and Lugnut. You guys have reached out to me and lifted me up. I consider this to be a very special gift to me personally, but since it's really about our shared humanity and proof of how good mankind can be, and that's it's something that needs to be shared. If what I write is in some way helping someone else it is not because I'm expressly trying to do so. I give the credit to God. I'm happy if he is using me in this way and He's welcome to use me up. I feel as though I've known all of you guys forever.

Pat, how does one respond correctly to such gracious comments? Wisdom of that caliber is not of this world. I stand to learn from you, and have followed this thread because I have so much to learn. You are in my prayers!

Pat- it's obvious your soul is churning up great things.

In the midst of great difficulty, you share with us the bitter and sweet of life. I know you don't feel courageous. I'm sure you feel that you're simply playing the hand you're dealt as best you can. But you my friend are a beautiful man, whom God has richly blessed with kindness and wisdom.

Thank you for talking to us, and helping us understand anew the gift of friendship and love.

For some reason as I close this note, I'm reminded of a quote from- of all people- Carl Jung.

"Bidden or not- God is Present".

I would also like to echo Bin's comments. Pat, there is not much I can say that others haven't. God Bless, you and your loved ones will remain in my thoughts and prayers.