About Lugnut -- Patrick Malone


Many of us have come to know Patrick Malone (Lugnut) as a friendly, helpful, knowledgeable and kind individual. He is a frequent and enthusiastic contributor to our analog discussion forum. He has initiated only 17 threads, but responded to 559 threads. I would guess that many, if not most, of us can recall a time when Pat replied with helpful advice to a question we posted or helped us track down a rare recording. I have come to love Pat as a friend, and to respect him as a man, and I suspect many of you share those feelings.

Today I write to share difficult news with you. Pat has been diagnosed with an aggressive stomach cancer. It has yet to be determined whether surgery will even be worth it. If surgery is performed, most or all of the stomach will be removed, and Pat would face a difficult and long post-op period in the hospital. The medical course is still uncertain, but will be determined soon. Whatever is decided, it will not be easy or pleasant.

Something may be planned in the future to assist the family. For now, Pat could use some of the friendship he so often and willingly showed us. You can email Pat at: lugnut50@msn.com. You can also mail cards, letters ... or whatever. You may email me for Pat's mailing address. My email is: pfrumkin1@comcast.net.

I hope to spend a few days with Pat in Idaho or Nebraska (from which he hails) soon. Between this news, my legal work, getting ready for family arriving for the holidays, Audio Intelligent, and trying to make plans to visit Pat, my head is spinning. If you email me and I don't respond, please understand that I am not ignoring you, but rather simply do not have time to reply.

Pat may or may not have time to respond to posts here, to emails, or to cards mailed to him. But he has asked me to convey to each and every one of you that he has cherished your friendship, your comradery, and sharing our common hobby on this great website.

As we prepare for our holiday season celebrations, and look forward to -- as we should -- enjoying this time of year, I ask that you keep Pat and his family in mind ... and softly offer up, in quiet moments in the still of night and early morning, prayers for Pat and his family. God bless.

Warmest regards to all,
Paul Frumkin
paul_frumkin
It's Tuesday morning, and I'm just getting back to this thread after being away for a few days attending my first cousin's wedding in the bucolic upstate New York mountains. We had a weekend focused on fun and celebration, eating (and drinking, though not for me), being outdoors, making/enjoying music, and meeting friends and relatives both old and new - in a setting featuring warm sun, brisk clean air, brilliant autumn leaves, interesting rocks and trees, snow-covered peaks, star-blanketed night skies (nice to see once in a while that the Milky Way is still around us) and panoramic mountaintop vistas revealed after a slightly grueling but invigorating (so you didn't mind the mud and slush) hike up. I found myself lingering, after group photos atop an abrupt rock face peak overlooking miles of valleys and ridges below, to watch as individual brightly colored leaves would every so often break free of their tree moorings and sail off gently into the abyss, yet not falling but buoyed upward and outward on thermals ascending the cliffside, floating away gradually against the blue sky like a slow and solemn dance procession. But all the while privately I kept wanting to hurry back home and to my computer because I knew I was missing this thread at a critical time.

That, and also because of an email exchange Pat and I had last week. You see, a few months back, when I sent Pat an old CD changer I had cooling in a closet, I did so with the threat that I would regularly be making and sending him CD-R's of whatever music I felt inspired to give him - mostly just in case he ever tired of having to get up and down to flip records during his illness, but also as a form of communication of my regard for him. Well, you know what they say about where the road paved with good intentions leads...

Despite plenty of initial enthusiasm I found I quickly became rather bashful about the prospect of imposing unsolicited music upon a guy I didn't really know, who had a large collection I was unfamiliar with the contents of, and who probably could no longer be in possession of the unthinking sense (that I suspect most of us are guilty of, however incorrectly in reality) that he had all the time in the world left in which to listen. Simply put, I didn't want to waste Pat's valuable time and attention on anything not of his own choosing, or that he or Barb might not dig as much as me. I was relieved when I learned that some of Pat's local friends - who presumably know his tastes better than I could - loaned or gave him several CDs, and after only a couple of stabs at sending him stuff, I aborted the mission thinking discretion might be the better part of valor in this case.

After reading recently that Pat had just 30 or so CDs to play I asked him last week if there was anything in particular he wanted, and instead he encouraged me to go ahead and send him whatever I felt like. I really wanted to deep down, so I agreed with both excitment and some reluctance to compile just one CD-R. I decided on making a collection from a group, my favorite among currently active rock bands, that I don't believe he's heard before, and I hope no one finds this too strange or inappropriate but part of the reason was because I feel they've written some inspiring songs about affirmation of life within comtemplation of death (though it's incidental, for those who might wonder the band is The Flaming Lips).

However I couldn't quite finish putting together the CD-R before we had to leave town, and after reading, the evening prior to our going, that Pat couldn't keep food down anymore, while we were away I feared it would really be too late upon my return for completing and overnighting the disk to be anything more than a futile gesture - even on the outside chance he might have liked the music nearly as much as I do, which of course was never any certainty. So now, reading Pat's most recent posts above, I've decided - again - that at this juncture I shouldn't send it after all. I feel kind of foolish concerning myself like this about something as small as a CD (though I myself will listen to it and think of Pat after he's gone) when Howard, who writes so eloquently, has actually traveled to be with Pat, but it's emblematic to me of the essential powerlessness I'm sure frustrates us all in this situation - with time slipping away, and words seeming like but leaves blowing away on the winds of a changing season we cannot alter.
Zaikes wrote "with time slipping away, and words seeming like but leaves blowing away on the winds of a changing season we cannot alter."

Wow! Those are incredible words!
Alex, you've done more than you'll ever know to affect Pat's life. He couldn't stop talking about the CD player you sent to them, and how it ignited his interest in digital. We listened to it for a couple of hours on the day I arrived. You are such a caring person, and it really comes through here.

Nate, I don't know what to say. You are a bright light in my world.

With this incredibly powerful conversation, Pat and Barb have given us all the powerful gift of community and friendship. Out of the blue, I received an e-mail last night from an Audiogon member who has been very close to Pat through this ordeal. He just wanted to be sure that I was not too pained by what is happening. I was stunned by his concern. I believe that this gracious honoring of humanity is exactly what Pat had hoped to bring to this community. Clearly, he has succeeded.
Wow Howard...BTW, that reminds me that I never remembered to ask Pat what was the result of hooking up that external DAC, if he did. Anyway, I stand in awe of the guys like you (and Paul, and Doug); of the group that assembled with Pat at Albert's place; of the Audiogon member who sends Pat medicine; and I'm sure many others - including everyone that cultivated a telephone relationship with "ol' Lugnut" - who went the extra mile of personally reaching out past the self-protective distance of the Internet to make an acquaintance in the flesh or by voice, with all the attendant emotional risk that entails, when you knew it would be taken from you before long. It's people like you who're really the caring ones, the ones with guts and a commitment translated into action. You're all loving people and role models for this community.

And - as if we needed any further evidence of it other than the words he has written here - Pat demonstrated he is truly a Wise Man (which I'm sure he'd deny :-) when he opened his heart to the whole crazy lot of us, rather than confine himself to the private and familiar, as I'd guess many of us might be inclined to do if we ever found ourselves in a similar circumstance. I suppose that, with his example for inspiration and guidance, someday there could be another thread on Audiogon not unlike this one, but I could never imagine anyone else pulling it off as naturally well as Patrick has done. Just so there's no mistake about it, it hasn't been his disease or his situation; it's been him, as our leader and teacher, who has made real and made worthwhile this special gathering - a testament to his character and his influence, which, as so many have declared, will endure inside us all.