The effect of the Expanding Universe on turntables


Since the Universe has been continually expanding after the Big Bang, then it stands to reason that all objects have expanded also , but not nessecarily in proper proportion. This means that the turntable you buy today will actually be larger(and contain more mass) at some date in the distant future (20 years?). I have now discovered why I have never had a used turntable (over 100 turntables) that is on accurate 33&1/3 RPM speed, even with quality synchronous motors. This phono-nomenon can only be attributed to the fact that all the motor parts and the platter are now larger and more massive than previously and thus the ratios of pullies and gears is no longer as designed (in the past), this is the only explanation I can offer as to why the speed of old turntables is faster than when new(by a small percent).It also explains why many older mechanical devices never work properly , no matter how well maintaied and repaired.
mint604
I bought this home-study course on TV about 20 years ago, on how to expand my JOhnSon, and thought I was really getting ripped off of the $99.95 I paid (plus tax, shipping & handling). They were basing their money-back guaranteed results on the SAME theory!
Shoot.....we don't need no herbal growth potions. All we gotta do is WAIT!
Yes, I meant "cite" not "site" -- as in "citation". Ever since the advent of web "sites" I both occasionally get "cite" and "site" confused (homonyms are so stupid, but they do enable amusement) and find myself typing so quickly, and for such trivial reasons, that I make this, and many other mistakes of a similar careless kind often, and let them through.

Hand check: how many of you early posters here really did have tongue in cheek, and how many were serious? From the OP's reply to johnnantais, I imagine he indeed was kidding, in which case my hat's off. Certainly one of the more successful, drier satyrical jibes I've come accross on this sight. I however, serious, I stand by my prior.
Don't wait to to long buy because MONEY is also inflating. Your $99.99 home study course would now cost $1,000, even though the authors had INFLATED EGOS.
I have had similar epiphanies during binge cleaning sessions on my Nitty Gritty. Watching all that spinning and listening to the groaning of the vacuum cleaner does indeed induce a sort of universal transcendence. Insights into the mysteries of black holes, exploding stars, curvature of space, and other cosmological phenomena have always been a part of the analog experience. Thank God my VPI came with a generous supply of Lithium for when these visions make it impossible for me to get my head out of my ass.

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