How to flatten Vinyl Albums

I did it the following way: I placed the record between to pieces of granite, set in the center of my backyard with my tool box on top. I did it in mid July. Left it out for an hour or so, then turned the water hose and cooled it down. It's the only good thing about summer in the Great Southwest Desert. Tarsando do you leave the cover on or off ;

Vegasears... I leave the cover off. Otherwise, the cardboard gets meshed in with the vinyl and it's harder to track. Plus, really, since the issue is flatness, the direct contact of the steel-belted radials with the bare lp stands the best chance of achieving maximal flatness. Hope this helps. (And because you mention it, I too live in that selfsame desert and do my best flattening in the summer before monsoons hit).

Find a nice fat-bottomed girl and have her sit on them.....the soundstaging actually increases if you also feed her while she's sitting on them.

I prefer round bottom babes... All my records are a flat as can be because I have a VPI Superscoutmaster with the periferal ring and center weight. I can't tell you enough how positively it affects the tonearm's performance. The arm sits quietly in the groove doing its work..it looks motionless. The resulting sound is great stability and naturalness.

Well, thank you all for your responses

I think the Babes are out, I'm married, butt then again my wife has a cute little... never mind.

Sounds like a breeze if one lives in a desert

As for the truck - did it have off road tyres? - the big FAT ones?

Now...the VPI Superscoutmaster sounds very nice - at first I thought it was one of those multi bladed do it all knives

Thanks for the smiles - I'll look up the old thread