You might be an audiophile if...


With apologies to Mr. Jeff Foxworthy, thought it would be fun to come up with (clean) examples of the wretched excesses that us poor audiophiles are subject to. I'll start it off. Extra points for originality and wit.

You might be an audiophile if your stereo costs more than your car. Or your house.

You might be an audiophile if - you've ever had to choose between a girlfriend and a new pair of speakers.
kinsekd
mwilson there's no need to get personal! I'm trying to plan better this year.
I know Mattybumpkin is BSing because there's NO WAY he'd miss a pass like that from Pam...or Christy for that matter.

I think Viridian has busted us all. Heheh.

Marco, I feed both an audiophile and automotive fix that may lead to me one day needing Fixident.

Boa2, you know it. I pay $122/mo for Empty Attic storage to house worthless crap AND my empty audio boxes.

...if your listening room looks like Junji Kimura's from 47 Labs. Mine certainly does.
You're an audiophile if your local high end store's salesment won't give you a demo of a high cost component you know you can't afford, and you get offended!
...if one or more of the following LP/CD's are among your collection:

Jazz at the Pawnshop
Anything by Diana Krall
Anything by Jacintha
Dark Side of the Moon*
Brothers in Arms*
Any Stereophile Test CD
Anything by Patricia Barber
Muddy Waters Folk Singer

*approved "Audiophile" version required (more than one copy of
either qualifies)

....if you own and listen to LPs/CDs which you don't even enjoy the music on
but they make your system sound really amazing

....if any of the following are on your speed dial

Your local high end shop
Your local music store
Rives

...if you've started a mutual fund for your kid's first system

...if your the cost of your analog rig could pay for a year at an Ivy League
school

...if your idea of a fun weekend is perusing garage sales and flea markets for
vinyl

...if you routinely find yourself with a half-dozen or more unopened CDs/LPs
among your collection, simply for lack of 'listening time'

...your local high-end shop has put up a plaque dedicating their new analog
listening room in your name
YMBAAI:

1) your on-going discussion about the glass table in the listening room with the wife eventually leads to an accidental hammer falling out of you pocket (onto it) as you were walking through the room to go fix something else..

2) You cancel the Stereophile cause you're ears are better than the reviewers ("what were they thinking when they said that!").

3) You're 4yr old son can point out that that's Louis singing and playing the trumpet, and Duke is on the piano (at the right times during the song of course).

4) Your spouse gave up on you long ago....